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Re: My parents refuse to think I have depression - December 8th 2015, 10:55 PM

Hey there and welcome to TeenHelp.

Depression is serious and it can impact a person a lot in negative ways. I imagine your parents love you a lot, and this makes it difficult for them to accept the idea of you having depression. Some people question whether or not depression is possible for youth as well. I can see how the way they are handling this would cause you to feel like you can't talk to them. You may have depression, and you may not but something is obviously bothering you a lot. And that makes it matter if it's bothering you. Have you asked them why they cannot see a possibility of you having depression? I realize that talking with your parents about this isn't the easiest thing to do, but I hope talking about this will answer your questions and hopefully help them understand and open their minds to these possibilities.

Perhaps you could put it that way to your parents? You can clarify that you can't diagnose yourself, but this has been bothering you and you feel like you may have depression. And you have no reason to believe you have anxiety and it'd mean a lot if they took your worries and honesty into consideration. Then you could ask them about getting an evaluation. If you want, you can speak to your counselor about this and have your counselor talk to your parents about this. If you don't experience many symptoms of anxiety, it's important to make that clear to your counselor and clarify also that you feel you may have depression.

As for your self-harm, may I ask if you began self-harming as a result of feeling low? How long have you been doing it? You don't have to answer that, but I just wanted to reassure you that I understand how it becomes a coping mechanism when you are experiencing difficult times. However, it can become addictive and become a whole new problem on its own. Have you explored different coping mechanisms, emotional outlets and distraction techniques? Here is a list of self-harm alternatives. There are plenty of distractions for when you are dealing with urges and/or difficult feelings. Try things on the list until you find a few that work for you. Different ones work for different people.

Finding healthy outlets so that you don't feel as much of a need to turn to self-harm and also don't bottle up feelings and thoughts is a good idea. Are there any creative outlets you are interested in that may help you right now? Art, creative writing and simply journaling can be therapeutic. Distracting yourself with hobbies you enjoy could help too. On another note, I was wondering if you find sports you do at school helpful in terms of lessening self-harm urges? Self-harm releases endorphins, just like the sun and exercise does. I was going to suggest that you could do a little bit of exercise when the urges get intense to see if that'd help any?

You seem to be having a hard time right now and I hope your parents start making more effort to understand what you are going through. Just keep in mind that their current ways doesn't mean they don't care for you, sometimes it's difficult to accept someone you love could be dealing with such a serious issue. Continue doing your best to get through to them. I wish you the best of luck. I hope my reply helped some. Take care!