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Palmolive Offline
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Name: Jessie
Age: 25
Gender: Girly.
Location: The stars.

Posts: 5,785
Blog Entries: 2319
Join Date: January 31st 2009

Re: Abusive to my Girlfriend - September 11th 2016, 09:38 PM

Hello!

Like said already, I think it is brilliant that you have A) recognised the way you are being abusive towards your girlfriend and B) that you have reached out for help with this. So be proud of yourself for that!

I am going to say the way you are treating your girlfriend is in fact wrong, but like said, you know that and that's a good place to start. I do think that every person who harms somebody else, has something bothering them or something that has had a negative impact on them in the past such as being abused themselves. Can you think of anything that has caused this anger and to behave this way towards your girlfriend? I think this is the next step to stopping the way you behave towards her.

I do think you reaching out for help is good and we're definitely here to support you based on personal experience, knowledge and for some of us, experiences of our work lives or volunteer based work. We will always try our best to support and help you as much as we possibly can do so. However we are not professionals and a big part of me really thinks that maybe if you reached out to a professional and worked on your anger issues with them, that it could really help you personally which would then turn your relationship with your girlfriend to be more positive instead of negative. SO thats something I would like you to think about; reaching out to someone for some help, even if that is a scary thought.

Lastly, yes, I have been abusive towards people. I have certainly been very angry and impulsive in the past (starting to move past it) but this has led me to trashing my room, hurting myself severely, hurting family members and when I have been hospitalised I was so angry and therefore determined to hurt myself that when I was being restrained (from by 4-10 staff members) I would do anything, including hurt them, just to hurt myself because I lost it in my mind that I didn't care at the time what I did because I was that angry. And do you know what? I think being abused as a child through into my teen years made me that angry. I would never hurt anyone intentionally.

I hope this helps and I hope you manage to seek out for help and support that you need and deserve and that things begin to look up for you and get better.

Hope and wishes,
Jessie


"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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