First of all, welcome to TeenHelp. It's a wonderful place and I am glad you are here. It's incredibly brave of you to share this and ask for help, so I hope you can find some space within yourself to be proud of yourself. Self-harm is very serious and, if left untreated, can become life threatening. It's hard to struggle with thoughts of wanting to hurt yourself, and I am very sorry you are dealing with those thoughts and struggling with those behaviors. It's a coping mechanism for a larger issue but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with.

If you think you need to go to the hospital I recommend going. I think it takes a great deal of self-awareness to say that to yourself and it takes even more bravery to follow through. If you think it's a safe space for you, and would help you stop hurting yourself, then go to your nearest emergency room. I know you're worried that they won't take you seriously, but they're there to help. If you let them know just how much you're struggling, and emphasize the fact you don't think you can stop on your own, they're probably more likely to admit you.

Good luck, and I hope you make the choice that's right for you. If you need anything please do not hesitate to message me. I've struggled with self harm for many years and I know how tough it is. I'm always willing to listen.

Take care.