I drown myself in fantasies these days.
I gorge myself on the hope that it will all go away in an instant.
I feast upon the desire to live a life that I can never have.
I chug the hope that one day I'll wake up and feel better all of a sudden down every day like a shot,
The feeling burning my throat.
I take pitiful bites of self love, care, and hygiene.
Repulsed by the taste.
And then I bury the flavour with harm, hatred and hopelessness.
What a shameful diet.
Though it's either this, or starve.