[Kate*]

I would only do that for you, and in return, I got shafted, and she didn't even speak to me; which may have another explanation, but is still off-putting. Maybe I'm not as welcome and wanted there as you made it seem. If you weren't as nice a person as you are, I would already be gone.

The conversation is definitely best saved for performance review time, or a discussion with your boss. The problem is, I don't know if I can hold out that long. And you wonder why I'm risk-averse with a paralyzing fear of failure! Because it's all I've ever known, dude. I take a risk, I fail, and the only thing I learn is that, because of who I am, I never should've bothered.