[Mindfulness.]

Today, I was doing some reflection from the past 5 years.

2020 - there was Covid and I moved out of home.
2021 - I started studying my teaching degree, I moved home again, I started a new weekend bartending job, my Grandmother passed away and Covid sent us into another lockdown. This all happened in the first 6 months of that year.
2022 - I got engaged and I was working 3 jobs.
2023 - I got married, I started a new full time job that was in line with my career and I went overseas for the first time in 4 years.
2024 - I focused on my health, studies and career.
2025 - I started working at a new school at the beginning of this year, we adopted a cat from a shelter, and my anxiety/depression has been through the roof.

Why has my anxiety/depression has been through the roof?

Because of 2 reasons:

1) It has to do with my new school. It can take me up to 35 minutes to get there and my salary is significantly lower than it has been in previous years. I am living paycheck to paycheck and last week, I barely scraped by in paying for my mortgage. I don't drink, smoke, do drugs or gamble nor do I splurge on expensive clothes or shoes. I've cut back on a lot of things such as getting my nails done, getting facials, I've found someone who does facial waxing cheaper and we don't go out for dinner as much as we used to. I've applied for student payments and I'm waiting to hear back about the outcome of my application. My boss said a comment to me a few weeks ago that has heightened my anxiety whenever I see him, making me think that he regrets employing me. I'm a temporary contract until the end of the new school year holidays which is until the beginning of next year and there have been a few things that I've seen and heard about and from him that I believe has not been professional. I've been offered a position at a local preschool which is not even a 5 minute walk and I will receive a higher salary if it doesn't fall through as well as being a permanent position. But I will only be there temporarily until I become a qualified teacher. I am seriously contemplating accepting this position but I don't want to burn any bridges. Yet, since been informally offered this position, I noticed that I'm no longer stressed about finances. It's like I've already tapped out from my current position.

2) I'm burned out. There's nothing more to it.