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I need out -
July 24th 2025, 09:20 AM
This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.
So I've been suicidal since fifth grade, when I got sexually abused and jumped twice. Now I'm going into eighth grade, and I'm still suicidal. 38 minutes ago, I tried to commit suicide. I'm contemplating not telling my therapist about it. I'll end up at the ER, and my family doesn't need that. Since mine is at a PHP/IOP program, they'll put it in as a PCP, so I'll have to be inpatient. None of my suicide attempts have knocked any sense into me that it's not the way. Like, I KNOW it's not the way, but it's fucking easier than anything else. I might try again tbh. I wish suicide could be painless, like a prick of a needle when you're getting a shot, but it's not. And at this point, I don't even care. I just need out of this world. This world is a motherfucking cruel place. I can't take it anymore. I need out, I feel like a dog in a kennel who has the zoomies, I can't keep up, I want out...I NEED out...should I tell my therapist...?
I can't help but repeat myself
"I know it's not your fault"
Still lately, I begin to shake
For no reason at all
~ I can't handle change - Roar ~
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