[MadPoet]

Hey Megan.

I can understand how you're feeling. I used to think there was nothing wrong with cutting, and actually posted a thread or two on this site asking what was so wrong with it. But I've been through a lot since then, and I think I finally learned what was so wrong with it when I was admitted to the hospital recently.

When I was there I kind of had a realization that I really have some problems. And those problems aren't being resolved by cutting or any other form of self harm. Even if it seems like it, you're not solving any problems when you self harm.

I think the question you need to ask yourself is, am I happy when I self harm? I don't mean WHILE you're self harming, but say an hour later. Do you feel like you've resolved anything? Do you feel like you've worked through your emotions? Do you feel like you've made progress through hurting yourself? I highly doubt your answer will be yes.

You can self harm for years, and you'll still feel depressed. Self harming isn't going to solve any of your problems. But, believe it or not, there are other alternatives that will solve your problems. You need to work towards helping yourself, not continuing to hold yourself back.

There are so many helpful ways to express your emotions. Try writing about how you feel, writing poems, writing in a journal. Even if they aren't exactly works of art, they're far more helpful and better for you than self harm is.

Better yet, try talking to someone about how you feel. Call up a friend or speak with a family member when you feel like self harming. Talking through your emotions is extremely beneficial and will probably make you feel a lot better.

I'm here if you ever need to talk. Remember that you don't deserve to be cut, scratched, bruised, or hurt in any way. You need to move forward, not back further.