[Brandon]

First, I'll provide my opinion on the circumstances you gave:

"I was with a guy I know and he put his hand on my leg. I was so shocked I didn't do anything. I froze. I was just preying it would be over."

Being in "shock" is too general to say. Being frozen up could've been a result of being uncomfortable and being uncomfortable doesn't always mean you're not willing. When I rode my first roller coaster several years ago, I was uncomfortable and froze up, but I eventually enjoyed it. Though I was uncomfortable, I still wanted to pursue riding the roller coaster. So I don't think that being shocked is always a legitimate excuse for calling rape because being shocked could be a feeling of "oh my Gosh, am I really doing this? Am I really engaging in pre-marital sex? Oh God...my mom is going to kill me...I'm going to be disowned! But it feels so good, why am I enjoying this SIN?! WHO AM I!? It's difficult to be fair for both genders because I think women should call rape if they felt helpless, but at the same time...a guy shouldn't fear having sex with a woman and the woman claimed that she was defenseless and just going along with it. I don't think silence is an answer, but I don't think people should be taken advantage of; that's why I recommend (and I know this is going to sound stupid) that we either really consider having people sign consent forms before sex, recording the person either through audio or video, or any indication to let people know that the other person consented. No, I think it's absolutely stupid to do that but I think that if we really want decrease the amount of innocent men/women from being wrongfully accused, and increase the amount of guilty men/women being rightfully accused, I think that's the steps we need to take because, unfortunately, hearing the word "yes" is never guaranteed to win an argument in the justice system. They need evidence. If you don't have evidence, then you don't have an argument. It can work against the guilty AND innocent. I believe that you explicitly need to say "no, I don't want to have sex with you" in order to indicate what you want, and I also think it should be documented.

"I was with a friend and he asked me if I wanted to have sex. I said no, but he told me I'd like it. I told him no again, but he kept asking. Eventually I just gave in and said yes."

I don't consider this rape either. When you give in because he wouldn't stop asking, you mutually consent. He wasn't forcing you and there were certainly ways of dealing with the issue, but when you choose to have sex with someone, you're consenting. If you have your own free will, then there was no forcible rape.

"Me and my ex were hanging out when he started kissing me. I was scared of what would happen if I tried to leave so I just went along with it."

If I were to be part of a gang and I had the option to go murder someone and I went because I was "scared of what would happen" if I didn't, that doesn't suite well in the justice system. My crime not be AS bad, but I was still an accomplice of the murder and therefore would receive some sort of punishment. Just because you were scared of what would happen doesn't mean you can call rape. This can be EASILY used against men (or women) who engage with consensual sex with you because all you'd have to say is "I was afraid so I just went along with it." I would understand a Nazi soldier during WWII's concentration camps, they were forced to kill innocent people and would probably be killed if they didn't, but I wouldn't understand these circumstances. If you have an ex boyfriend, that would indicate that you were once attracted to him. You are also hanging out with him. How often do we hang out with our ex's and think of each other as friends? Very suspicious behavior. If you are afraid of him kissing you, then why do you hang out with him? I don't think that'd be considered rape either because from those circumstances, it seems totally consensual even if you claim that you were afraid. Because, to me, it would seem that you hung out with this dude just to set him up and get him in trouble with the justice system.