[Storyteller.]

Hey Julia.

In short, my story was this: I was never really attracted to guys, but it took me quite a while to realise I was attracted to girls. For quite a while it just didn't occur to me that I wasn't straight, so I never even thought about being same-sex attracted. I sort of pushed away the random thoughts of 'She's cute' or 'I like her', so I didn't start to come to terms with it until I was about fifteen. The thing is, just because something is part of you doesn't mean you're aware of it.

For example, think of your favourite food. Did you always know you liked it? Or did you have to try it first? Did you avoid it because you thought it looked weird? (Or was that just me? I stayed away from mangoes because I thought they were too slimy, but now I love them. ) Sometimes it takes experimenting, thinking, or even a 'trigger' to bring out certain parts of you. Sometimes you might just not realise it's there, or for whatever reason you may not want to realise it (fear of being different or discriminated against, for example). So, no, you don't necessarily always know it; although of course that's the case with some people.

I firmly believe that sexuality is not a choice, it's a feeling. Did you choose to be straight? I doubt it. So why should being gay, bisexual, or pansexual be any different? You said you have no control over who you like, which is the case with everyone: you can't choose who you fall in love with, or even what gender they are. Has any of this helped at all, or am I just rambling?

Take care.