TeenHelp - i cant stop cutting .

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- - i cant stop cutting . (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f12-self-harm/t97558-i-cant-stop-cutting/)

i cant stop cutting .

I Dont trust myself any more .
Ive recovered from my manic depression , but my self harm seems to be getting worse . It started off with scratches like most people , and now i get blood loss and need stitches .

Ive gotten rid of my blades , but i get desperate at times and i break glass cups . I feel like i have to cut because its a normal thing for me , i hate seeing my arms bare , with no fresh cuts .

I cant seem to stop , and its scaring me .

Meh any advice?

Re: i cant stop cutting .

I this isn't much help , but I'm the same way .. & it's like when your arms are bare & you see them you get the feeling that you just have to do it ... I know exactly how you feel .. Except , when I get rid of my blades & I need a new one , I get one .

Re: i cant stop cutting .

Hey there,

I'm really sorry things are hard for you at the moment, self harm isn't good for you and you probably know that. Blood loss can cause some serious damage and i think it's great that you have gotten rid of your blades.
I would suggest taking a look at the alternatives thread, they will help to distract you while the urges fade. It is trial and error and therefore not all of them may work for you, but hang in there and you will find one that does.

You can stop, you need to believe in yourself. We all slip, it's a part of recovery but learn for it, keep pushing forward, you can get through this.

If you ever want/need to talk, fee free to PM me,
Take care and stay strong,
Charli

Re: i cant stop cutting .

Hey Kim, I noticed at the bottom of your page that you have a scripture. If you truly know and the love the Lord, you should pray and ask him to help you to stop, and to give you strength when you feel weak. The bible tells you where you are weak he is strong, so call him and he will deliver your from this and it will be for his glory and your personal testimony. I'll be praying for you. You can message me if you want to talk or just need some encouragment.
Jesus Love You!!

Re: i cant stop cutting .

Have you ever tried to think of it a different way? That having an arm without fresh cuts is a positive thing, not a negative thing. It means you've been strong enough to resist the urge to cut, and that's something to be proud of. But if you hate having bare arms, have you tried the butterfly project? More information is on the alternatives thread, but basically you draw a butterfly on your arm and if you cut the butterfly it dies, and if you manage to let the butterfly fade away naturally, then you've let it live and it will fly away, and you should reward yourself. Just something to try :) Also drawing on your arm with red ink or paint gives the illusion of blood if that's what you miss. I don't cut but I have a friend that does and she says it helps her :)

Good luck and stay strong <3

Re: i cant stop cutting .

Hi there :-)

Firstly, it's great that you've come to us for some help and support. By you posting this, it really does help me think that part of you does want to stop, wants the help to stop, but that you don't really know how or why.

Firstly, Laura had some very good advice. Don't look at not having cuts on your arms in a negative way. Not having cuts, is extremely positive. Ir proves that actually, you don't need self harm and you are stronger than the urges. You should check out the butterfly project because it means you having something on your skin which might help you. Try looking through the list of alternatives too. There are other things like putting red nail varnish, pens on your skin to resemble a cut which helps some people but they're other things like walking, going out with friends, watching a film, having a bath, doing work etc that might help too. It's all about trial and error because not everything, works for everyone.

I've struggled with self harm for a long time now and like you, this time last year I was hurting myself badly and needing medical attention. And Charli is right, blood loss can cause serious problems. I became anemic because of it and was passing out a few times a day and throwing up but it could get to a point where you need a blood transfusion. And then it could be worse. You could cut yourself too deep and it could lead death. You could get a cut infected and in a worse case it can lead to amputation.

I was put in to hospital for eighteen weeks and I'm still getting help. I was just wondering whether you're getting any help for your issues? I don't know what's caused you to feel so low that you started self harming but if you want to talk to us about it you're more than welcome to do so. At least try talking to someone. Us, a friend, family members, a teacher, a school nurse, a doctor, they all care, we all care and we can try and help you if you let us is.

Just remember, as hard as it is, you're in control of your actions and in the end, the only person who can stop you from hurting yourself, is you. No one else can stop you from self harming. We can listen to you and give you advice but it's up to you to take out advice and turn it in to an action. You can do this you just need to stay positive, distract yourself and work through the problems. Remember, being self harm free is positive. You're worth a lot more than the pain you cause yourself and you don't deserve it at all.

Keep your chin up,
Jessie