Bulimia
 

Hi,
My friend has bulimia. How can I help her overcome this? People always make fun of her.

Re: Bulimia
 

Re: Bulimia
 

Re: Bulimia
 

Hey there,

I am sorry to hear about your friend's struggles. It sounds like she has been dealing with a lot. It's really great that she has a caring friend like you. I am wondering if your friend has talked to someone about her bulimia? I know that might be hard for her to do but getting help for it would probably be the best thing.

In regards to what you can do to try and help, I agree that the best thing you can do is letting her vent to you. Sometimes all people need is to know that they have a safe person to talk to and that they are cared for. I think something you need to remember is that you cannot fix your friend. You can support her but you can't make her better. I know it's hard to see a friend struggling but if you try and fix her it will likely take a huge toll on your mental well-being.

Wishing you the best. :)

Re: Bulimia
 

Many communities offer things like support groups, especially for young people with EDs. Perhaps you can refer her there to be part of group that would help her recover.

Letting her vent and creating a safe space in your friendship where she can be honest and vulnerable is amazing. Not all people have that, so continue to nurture that, but remember that you're not a therapist or other person who can necessarily provide the tools to help heal something as complex as an eating disorder, so along with a support group, something like a therapist or nutritionist specializing in bulimia would be awesome.

Re: Bulimia
 

Oh. that's bad. To help someone, it's important to understand the conditions and the symptoms.

Bulimia is an eating disorder but it roots from a psychological condition and causes many health risks.

- Loss of sodium and potassium from body
- muscle weakness, fatigue
- Cardiac risks
- Dehydration
- Too much vomiting
- Irregular digestion
- Ulcer

Be careful.

Re: Bulimia
 

I'm sorry to hear that but i'll tell you one thing you can do though just be there for her don't force her to stop or anything just be there for her it will help, ALOT. Any again sorry just be there for her if she needs to vent as well.

M

Re: Bulimia
 

HI lucyhiggs. I'm sorry to hear this. Do you know if there is any professional help involved? If there's no options for that, how about a school counselor? That is the first place to start because we want to make sure your friend gets the proper treatment. However, no one can fully recover unless they truly want to commit to recovery and a life free of ED.

As far as what you can do, the best thing is just to be there to listen. Let him/her know that he/she's not alone and even ask how you can help. Simply asking is a great way to express your concern and that you care. One of the things I wish people would've done in my situation is just letting me explain myself and teach them how to help.

Everyone has their own story and one of the worst feelings in the world, in my opinion, is being misunderstood. The best way to know how to help your friend is simply asking how you can help because everyone is different.

Re: Bulimia
 

Sorry for you both, I suggest for you to be strong and stay on her side as always.

Re: Bulimia
 

Do people make fun of her for having an eating disorder? Or are they making fun of her for other things? Do you feel that being bullied is contributing to her eating disorder?

I feel like those are all important questions, along with what do you know about eating disorders? Does she know that you know and has she asked for help? Who else knows about it?

Honestly, I think you can provide support, a safe space, you can try to be there by knowing more about ED's, etc. so you can know how to support her. But I think it is also important to note that bulimia (and other EDs) are often complex and difficult to overcome. She'll likely need more than just a good friend (e.g. a doctor, a therapist and a nutritionist) in order to help her deal with the physical aspects, such as managing her diet in a healthy way, and her doctor to help with the medical side, such as doing blood work and helping if she's experiencing other side affects like anorrhea (I spelled it wrong but it's where your period stops). Then a therapist matters cause EDs are usually psychologically driven, like were you're being bullied or have controlling parents and focus that lack of control or self-hatred on your food and body.

If I had a friend who had bulimia, I'd do some of the following:

** I'd have an honest talk with her and let her know my concerns -- she's either going to open up or she won't, but at least she'll know I am concerned, that I care, and that I am a safe person for her to speak too

** If we ate food, I'd try to distract her afterwards. I won't post exactly why here because it's triggering and also Google-able but there is a time frame for when you have to purge by vomiting. I might openly let her know that I am doing with something like "out of concern for you, if we're in a situation where food is involved, I am going to try to do what I can to keep your mind off of it so that if you're getting the urge to purge, hopefully keeping your mind off it can help"

** I would also want her input on how I could be a good friend to her -- for example, telling her she can call or text me if she's about to (or has) binged or purged and that we can talk about it, or I would see if there are other things she might think helpful, for example, maybe she'd prefer I take her for a walk around the block if we've gone out for dinner, or maybe she'd really benefit from being able to do things where food isn't involved, and maybe she'd want a friend to go with her to her first therapy appointment and so on.

** if you believe she might have just purged, don't say anything where people can overhear or see, you can simply wait for a private moment and say something like "hey, I thought it seemed like maybe you excused yourself to purge, I'm not trying to call you out, I just want to make sure you're ok". She's not going to get better overnight but having someone who'll check in will help :)

Also, remember to protect yourself. Having a friend who's experiencing a mental illness like this can be exhausting and taxing on your own mental stability, so don't forget to check in with yourself and take care of yourself; this is also why I believe it's important she gets treatment/care from qualified professionals because you aren't likely to be able to make her bulimia go away and it would be crazy to expect you to be more than a good friend (e.g. you can't be a nutritionist, a therapist and a doctor for her).

Re: Bulimia
 

Feeling very sad about your friend and it is not good thing to make fun of others. You should always be there for her or you can suggest her parents about family based treatment therapy that help to recover from bulimia.