Should I tell my doctor?
 

I tried to kill myself at the start or june and I've been seeing my GP since then who has put me on 2 types of anti-depressants. They're not working though. I feel worse than ever. I can't cope anymore. I've started cutting again and I think about suicide constantly. She knows I used to cut but I don't know whether I should tell her that I'm cutting and suicidal again. I don't want her to tell anyone but I know I need help before I try to kill myself again. I had to stay round my friends house last night because she was so worried that I was going to hurt myself. I can't carry on like this, but I don't know how to turn things around :/
advice please?

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

You should tell your doctor, your over 16 so she won't have to tell your parents and everything you share with her will be between the two of you, you obviously want help so tell her - I'm sure she'll do her best to help you, also mention that the medication she's given you isnt working.

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

Hi there Ella,

I'm sorry to hear that you've been having such a bad time.

It's excellent that you've been seeing your GP and that you've been able to get some medication. I'm sorry that you don't feel as though they're working for you - that must be pretty frustrating for you. Unfortunately, some anti-depressants can make you feel worse. Don't stop taking them suddenly, though - go and talk to your doctor about it and hopefully they will be able to change or modify your medication.

There are many treatments for depression and so there will be something out there that works for you - depression is very treatable and things can change for the better. I do think that you need to tell your doctor that you are self harming and that you are suicidal so that she can give you the help that you deserve. No one would want you to hurt yourself. Your doctor is there to give you the help and support that you need.
Have you tried psychotherapy or counselling? They are also very good treatments for depression - it can really help to talk things through, find new coping mechanisms and it's nice to know that you have that extra support from someone.

Please try and talk to someone, Ella.
Take care.

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

Hey Ella,

definitely tell your doctor. It's great that you have a friend who was there look out for you - you could maybe even ask that person to come with you to your doctor, for morale support, maybe.

Hang in there.

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

what will happen if i do tell my doctor about the cutting? Will she ask to see the cuts? I'm so scared. I feel so awful. I don't think I can wait till thursday to see my doctor but I couldn't get an appointment any sooner unless I took time off work for it and I already had to fill in a huge medical declaration for it so if I have time off for being messed up they're gonna think I'm completely unhinged and fire me. If HR tell my manager all the stuff thats on my medical declaration I don't know what I'll do. I can't handle having people know all this stuff about me.

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

I'm not completely sure what doctors do about cutting, but if she does ask to see the cuts, she'll probably just want to make sure they're not infected. She'll probably want to find out why, what's been triggering you, and work with you on finding ways to cope without cutting. And you can talk to her about all the things that you're worried about, and your doctor should be able to work something out so that you're comfortable with how it's being handled, how work is factoring in, things like that. The doctor is there to help, not to make things feel even more out of control. I guess call today to get an appointment ASAP, and maybe ask your friend if you can stay with her until your appointment, so that there's someone else there to help look out for you to make sure you're okay, too.

Hang in there. It'll be okay :)

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

Your doctor will probably make sure there not infected and come up with some ways to help you prevent or even stop you cutting yourself, she'll just do her best to help you. Just go at an appropriate time for you but as soon as you can, and stay with your friend until then if you can so you feel safer.

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

Ella,

Hey there, I'm glad you're keeping us update because we're all here to help you get through to Thursday. Don't count yourself out, okay? It's never a good idea to doubt yourself before you're even half way there. You have potential, like we all do. You have an importance in this world and people care for you. If they didn't, your friends would never watch you and show they care. If you can't keep going for anything else, keep going for your friends. Until Thursday comes, maybe you should start being more social, this way someone is always around you to help and such.

Try not to worry about your work finding out, I'm pretty sure your doctors can't share any of this information with them. You're not going crazy and you're not unhinged. You're just going through a rough spot, and that's okay. We all do, but at least you're doing the right things and confronting it. Sometimes when we start anti-depressants, they can cause things to get worse instead of better. Maybe those medications aren't right for you. If that's the case, then the only person who can help you is your doctor. It's a good idea to be confronting this. Many other medications are out there, along with many different solutions that could help you; such as therapy? Just because what you're trying now doesn't work, doesn't mean you won't find a perfect match later on. You just need to hang on and realize that this takes time. If you need anyone to talk to at all throughout this time, let me know okay? You're not alone and I'm more than willing to talk and give you an ear. :]

-Have hope

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

All I want to do is cry :( and then kill myself. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't cope. I need help

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

Ella,

If you find yourself coming too close to wanting to harm yourself, don't be shy to call a help line in your area. Anything that deals with emergency suicide prevention. Don't hold back if you need someone to talk to at that moment in time.[HERE] is a list of hotline numbers you can use. Right now, just do what you can to get through the days. You have less than a week. Keep yourself busy and try to be around people when you can. Don't give up on yourself, especially when help is so close. We're all here to pull you to Thursday. You have a whole site behind you. Utilize all the options we have here. Check out the sticky Hold On To Hope.

Try to do what you can to pull through and keep going. Suicide isn't the answer to how to fix this, I know you know that or else you wouldn't be reaching out. There are things that can be fixed and you'll feel better. Just hang on and rely on friends to help you for now. Take care of yourself and if you're ever wanting to give up, send me a PM. :]

Re: Should I tell my doctor?
 

Hey Ella,

I definitely second all of Melissa's advice.

Honey, you can cope. Coping means finding a way to get through until you see your doctor. And as long as you hang on for just one more second, one more minute, one more hour, one more day, and then split second by split second, one more week, you'll get through. Maybe view this next week as a time not that you have to endure worrying, but as a time for you to take extra you-time and to do things each day that you like to do, to help brighten that day.

Hang in there. And feel free to PM me anytime :)