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-   -   Being Bullied (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f20-peer-pressure-bullying/t79123-being-bullied/)

rusher July 12th 2011 06:28 PM

Being Bullied
 
Now, bullying is nothing new to me. I've been dealing with it my whole life. But this school year has been more bullying than all my school years combined. Now, I have one group of people who I've had to deal with all year. The leader of them seems like he has anger issues because he keeps trying to get into a fight with me for no reason. The second-in-command is a sarcastic,smirking blonde guy who I hate more and more every day. He keeps commenting about my voice, my appearance and everything else about me. Then there's this girl and her obnoxious clique. Bad enough, I have the Three Stooges on my tail. Now I have to deal with her. For some reason, since she's female, she thinks she could get away with anything. And I mean ANYTHING. On multiple occasions, I had to deal with this group. Then there's online. I get bullied there too. I had enough mental and physical harm from the monsters at school ( trying to shake me down, punch me because they wanted to, insult me etc.), now I have to deal with numerous insults. I already had to deal with this with my parents 4 times during the school year and to be honest, I'm just glad this time next year, I won't see any of them ever again. At least the real ones. To this day, I'm still getting emails and messages . Some from people I don't even know. Now, I could understand some of this because I have a small group of friends and sometimes I'm on my own. But I'm still upset with this whole thing. I had to go to 9 websites for help, now that's when things are going too far. Sometimes, I feel like I can't even just be in a good mood without them coming around like this. Please help. :(

WhisperingSilence July 12th 2011 06:35 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
There is an easy way to stop the emails and messages. Block. Delete. Remove. Keep the messages take them to the police. Take the messages to the school head / principle. And show them the messages. Tell the head / principle about the bullying in school as well. Once you've taken the messages to the head/principle and told them about the bullying in school as well. They should hopefully stop the bullying. You could also tell the police about the bullies beating you up in school as well and get them told off by the police for assault.

rusher July 12th 2011 06:43 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
It's hard to block the senders since they are all unknown. Most of the people know about the bullies and although my classmates help me, the bullying still goes on. Sometimes, I get called "special ed" or "retard" all because I'm smart and I could care less about what they call me. But the messages seem to be from people outside school. Now the clique will be hard to deal with. Now I really don't believe this " boy can't hit a girl" thing. If the girl hits me first, I have the right to self defend. I mostly tried the options before and sadly, they either hit a dead end or just made things worse.

Unknown10 July 12th 2011 06:52 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
Hi there,

I'm sorry you're getting bullied, there are many ways bullying can be sorted though. As the above poster has stated, simply blocking and deleting these people off your IM/Social Networking Profiles will help reduce the cyber bullying you are experiencing as they won't be able to get in touch with you. Keeping the things they say to you is a good thing; you can do this via print screen or copy and paste it into a document for evidence if you decide to tell somebody about it.

Talk to a family member (such as your parents) or a teacher. They should be able to sort out the physical and verbal abuse. If the problems still persist and the bullying doesn't seem to have been resolved you should go to the police as they will sort it out. They will most likely issue them with a warning, the bullies may stop too. They'll definitely get into trouble as you shouldn't have to put up with this, nobody deserves to be bullied in any way.

Feel free to PM me if you need anything at all.
Take care.

OMFG!You'reActuallySmart! July 12th 2011 07:25 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
I assume you've already told the teachers and principal as well as your parents but to no avail. Even if the school does intervene, it would probably antagonize the situation even more because the penalty would be light and the bullies would be pissed off. They may also mock you by giving fake calls for the teacher.

When the sarcastic guy makes comments to you, then give the same/similar types of comments back to him. It may antagonize the situation but if you can stand up for yourself and verbally take out the bullies, you'll become a harder target.

One of the ways you can do this is to first have a decent sized audience of students watching. From there, say to them they must feel so pathetically weak they need to bully a weak, smaller and defenseless student. You can then egg them on to do something so they can show everyone how proud they are they can win a 3-1 fight against the smallest and weakest student. If they say an insult about your clothing, you can say the only reason they have their clothing is because their daddy and mommy have a big wallet (this assumes their clothing is fancy and expensive). The goal of this is to humiliate the bullies by emphasizing their actions, even though other students already know of the situation, when you do it likes this, you begin to reverse the power differentials.

You have the right to defend yourself, however, it may just lead to greater problems. The girl can cry abuse and other guys can see you've hit her or did something to hurt her, violating the traditional culture that boys cant hit girls. The better route though would be to have witnesses and ideally record the incident. If there are bruises, then document them and keep doing so over time.

Once you have this evidence, go to the principal and demand (not ask) he/she does something, then show the video evidence. Tell the principal you're going to file a police report against the girls and against the school for not providing reasonable assistance causing bodily harm. Furthermore, threaten to bring the story and evidence to the local newspaper because you've had it with the insufficient discipline from the teachers and principal. At that point, if the principal has a functioning brain, he/she will give in. However, even if he/she does give in, still issue a police report against the girls.

rusher July 12th 2011 07:43 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
Well, the sarcasm doesn't help a lot. If anything, it just makes them a) even more abusive or b) try to get me back. I mostly self-defend myself and other people. The girl makes several insults about my clothes and when I make insults back (" Well, the only reason you have it is because of your rich dad" etc.) , she manages to get stuck for a few minutes until one of her male defenders steps in. I do nothing to her and she gets up in my face. Now not only is she's mental but she's also one of the shortest girls in my grade. I use that as a weakness. The online ones shouldn't be much of a problem. They mock my voice even though it sounds normal. So I have no idea what's up with that. And there's these three annoying boys who keep trying to set me up with my classmate against my will. I just ignore them and sometimes chase them down because they steal my stuff. But it doesn't go to the Principal. It actually goes to my floor's AP or second-in-command. They had to deal with that numerous times. Luckily, I almost never see the Three Stooges except for Mondays which really sucks.

WhisperingSilence July 12th 2011 09:23 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
Could you go to the principle yourself and tell them about the bullying. So it goes straight to the principle and not through teachers and AP or second in commands ?

Coreless_Serenity July 13th 2011 03:47 AM

Re: Being Bullied
 
I'm sorry you're getting bullied, that's a horrible thing they are doing. And no one should have to endure that torture. First of all: with the cyberbullying, don't delete it, keep it for evidence. Cyberbullying is illegal in a lot of places. If no one is doing anything about this at your school, then go directly to the principal. If your principal still fails to take action; then go to the police. Schools should have a no tolerance policy against bullying and can get into serious trouble if they knew a student was getting physically/verbally abused but did nothing about it. Bullying is not acceptable and something should be done about it. Keep strong and if your principal doesn't sort it out, the police will.

PM me if you need anything at all.
Love,
~Kenny

rusher July 13th 2011 07:56 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
Well, I used to do that but then the emails stopped some. So I stopped keeping it for evidence. And sometimes nobody really sorts things out. Once, the Three Stooges forced me to go to a so-called "peace treaty". Once they and their gang crowed around me while insulting me, I decided to get out of there. This one kid pushed me. I pushed him back so I could get out of the circle. Luckily, my friends and a couple of my classmates came over and took care of them. I guess, some things are just unresolvable.

waiting.in.the.wings July 13th 2011 08:57 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
Rusher, I'm really sorry that this is happening to you. No one deserves to be treated that way. NO ONE.

What those people are doing to you is horrible, and you should let them know that. Stand up to them, then ignore them. Smile at them in the hallway. Killing them with kindness works, but you can't break. You always have to be kind. If they say something about it, just tell them that you're the bigger person.

And as to the comment about boys not being able to hit girls: Bullshit.

Sure unprovoked, maybe. But still, if a girl hits first, I see no reason not to defend yourself. But only to defend yourself.
That girl sounds like a bitch, and it's girls like her that karma LOVES to catch up to(:

rusher July 13th 2011 10:45 PM

Re: Being Bullied
 
Well, I have attempted some of the ideas I have given. And I have to say things have been a success. Except with the girl. But I guess there are some people that you cannot cure. Only karma can.


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