Lonely parasite.
 

I just broke up with my boyfriend of two years...

We were making plans of moving out of our parents' homes together a few days ago. I didn't tell anyone except my sister because I don't get along with anyone else in my family, so screw it they don't have to know until they see me packing my bags. He told his mom, who didn't like the idea but agreed to "give her approval" if he ended up going but that his room would be kept for him in case he returned. We all assumed the whole thing ended there so whatev's.

Today I go on Facebook and I see she posted something on his page, basically saying "not everything that shines is gold, you'll realize you're making a huge mistake." Suspicious. So I go in her page and I see she posted a whole bunch of negative things about this supposed "parasite." More suspicious. I went to his sister's page and the dookie hit the fan. She's got a whooooole bunch of stuff calling him out and calling the so-called "parasite" out, saying he's always making mistake after mistake, dedicating him music videos about how love is blind, just... really hurtful things.

I felt like crap. Seriously. I've been nothing but a good person to his family, even though I've always known his sister is a hypocritical bitch and his mom is also a bitch, except of the more sophisticated variety. Always kept my silence and took all the indirect insults, took the direct insults from his stepbrother who thinks he's the smartest person to walk the Earth...

Like... really? Is it absolutely necessary to publish on an extremely social website that your son/brother is "making the biggest mistake of his life" and "leaving with a loud-mouthed, low-class parasite"? Enough is enough... my dignity comes first. I've taken too many blows and served as a doormat long enough.

Unfortunately... I love him. I've never felt like this for anyone. I can't visualize myself without him. I can't stop crying, I can't fall asleep as much as I've tried, it feels like a truck ran me over. Just... how can I possibly get over him? I don't have any distractions. I don't have a job and I don't study. I'm at my house all day, cooking and cleaning and being a "parasite." I'm so lost and I don't have any friends, so I'm extremely alone. What can I do? Should I just get back together with him? But then I'd have to shun even more people than I already do... this is so confusing.

Re: Lonely parasite.
 

I am so sorry that his mother did that to you. I can't stand my boyfriend's mother, and sometimes she'll say "subtle" remarks about me, but never anything like that. To me it seems like she is rather controlling, you know that sort of "he is my son and no woman will ever love him as much as me" mother? I know it's hard, but I wouldn't take what she said personally, she would probably say it about any girl he was with. So just don't let it affect you too much. Be angry about it and refuse to put up with it for sure, but don't listen to anything she says.

Though I don't understand why you and your boyfriend broke up? If he really loves you, who cares what his mother says? I would talk to him and try to sort something out. Maybe you just don't go around to his house when she is there. You are moving out together anyway, so that shouldn't be a problem. But he has to be standing up for you and telling her that what she says isn't appropriate. If he is willing to do that, then I see no reason why you shouldn't be together.

Re: Lonely parasite.
 

He never stands up for me, that's the thing. I'm constantly under attack by his sister and his stepbrother and the indirect remarks by his mom... I had a huge issue with his stepbrother and my boyfriend refused to stand up to him until I gave him a reality check about how if I should become his wife or the mother of his children would he let anyone offend me just like that?

I broke the whole thing off because I don't find it fair that we're searching for happiness and yet people are trying to constantly sabotage us. I'm in a living hell every day with my insane mom and all and dealing with more evil-ness doesn't sound too appealing to me. I just want peace...

Re: Lonely parasite.
 

That's hard. I'm so sorry that you're going through this, dealing with the frustrating family of someone you love can be so difficult. However I think you should talk to your ex. I understand you're frustration at him never standing up for you, but have you talked to him about that? Does he know EXACTLY how much it bothers you and what exactly bothers you? And maybe once you two are back together you could do little things to try and get them off your back, do you have a technical school near you? I know I have one near me that offers great cooking classes, and you said you like to cook. Or maybe if you don't want to get a job try volunteering at a place you love? Or maybe even get a job? I hope this helped at least a little... if not feel free to PM me. Hope everything works out.