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Odyne March 7th 2026 07:59 AM
I miss him and I hate him
 
February 2025: My boyfriend breaks up with me after 8 years.
But it wasnt a healthy relationshop.

The first years were the best years of my life.
Then he stopped at his medication and things got bad - he yelled and screamed and destroyed things, and all I could do was to cry and then he got more mad.

These years I hate.
And I miss the good years.

Dude111 March 7th 2026 12:37 PM
Im so sorry sweetie.........

Odyne March 7th 2026 01:06 PM
Re: I miss him and I hate him
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dude111 (Post 1404696)
Im so sorry sweetie.........
:hug: that’s kind of you

Face Up. March 8th 2026 07:32 PM
Re: I miss him and I hate him
 
What you're feeling is valid. I know it wasn't a healthy relationship but eight years is a long time, especially since the first years were fine. Eight years isn't something easy to move on from where you'll feel okay instantly. I think it's even okay that you remember the good times as long as you don't ignore the fact that after the good times there were unhealthy times as well and that you didn't deserve to be treated like that. I don't think there's a right/wrong amount of time to move past a relationship like this.

Odyne March 8th 2026 08:00 PM
Re: I miss him and I hate him
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Face Up. (Post 1404756)
What you're feeling is valid. I know it wasn't a healthy relationship but eight years is a long time, especially since the first years were fine. Eight years isn't something easy to move on from where you'll feel okay instantly. I think it's even okay that you remember the good times as long as you don't ignore the fact that after the good times there were unhealthy times as well and that you didn't deserve to be treated like that. I don't think there's a right/wrong amount of time to move past a relationship like this.
It’s just hard to remember. Every time someone gets angry or mad, I just start crying.

Mindfulness. March 10th 2026 08:06 AM
Re: I miss him and I hate him
 
Hi Lucy,

I'm sorry to hear what happened.

I was in a similar situation as you, but I wasn't with my ex for as long. There were really good moments but then the bad eventually became too much and it is hard to forget the life you had with him.

If you ever need to talk, feel free to inbox me. :hug:

Odyne March 10th 2026 11:42 AM
Re: I miss him and I hate him
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mindfulness. (Post 1404783)
Hi Lucy,

I'm sorry to hear what happened.

I was in a similar situation as you, but I wasn't with my ex for as long. There were really good moments but then the bad eventually became too much and it is hard to forget the life you had with him.

If you ever need to talk, feel free to inbox me. :hug:
Thank you, lovely :hug:

theantihero March 10th 2026 12:19 PM
Re: I miss him and I hate him
 
Your feelings are valid, it's okay to miss the good times but hate the bad. I think it's important to hold on to the good memories, knowing that time of your life in over; but also take the bad moments and remind yourself you're worth more than the way your ex treated you. I hope you've been able to get support for this in recent months. :hug:


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