[Ennui.]

Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through right now!

Just because you didn't do so well your first quarter, doesn't mean the rest of your quarters are going to be bad. Do you know what it was that made you not do your homework? If you didn't understand the material or just have a difficult time focusing in a large class, maybe you can speak to the teacher about staying for extra help. It's a calm environment and sometimes it can help to learn one-on-one where you can be more focused and get individualized attention. Maybe you can have a study group with friends, provided you get work done.

I think it may also help you a lot to find ways to release your stress. Exercise is one good way to get your stress out, as well as stay healthy! It releases some pretty good chemicals. You don't have to do anything extreme, maybe just a walk, jog, or bike ride. Or, you can use self expression, such as writing, art, or music, to get everything out.

Even punching yourself is a form of self harm, as it can leave lasting marks such as bruises. It's not really good to cope by inflicting pain on yourself, whether punching or not. It doesn't really solve any of your problems and you'll have to worry about it escalating later on. Not only that, but if you DO leave any bruises from punching yourself, you will have to either think of excuses for them or hide them. Instead, when you have the urge to harm yourself, whether it is punching, cutting, or something else, why not use an alternative? A list is located here. These are healthier, safer things you can do so you won't have to self harm.

Is there anyone you can talk to about this? For instance, you can speak with a friend or family member, club adviser or coach, teacher, guidance counselor, school nurse, doctor, religious leader, or even a therapist. I know the idea of talking to someone can be scary but they can really help you through this. They can be someone you can vent to so there's not as much stress. They can give you suggestions to solve your problems so they aren't there anymore, and help you cope in different ways so you never do start cutting. If one person doesn't listen, don't get discouraged, there will always be someone to listen!

I know things may be hard now, but starting to self harm really won't make things better. In the end, it will actually make things worse to start cutting when you have to worry about hiding everything, preventing infection, and the addiction that comes with cutting, all on top of whatever else was stressing you out to begin with. It's much better to try and find ways to solve the problems such as getting support, so you never have to go down that road.

You can do this!

-Dez