[Celyn]

Hey there,

Your post wasn’t rambly at all, so don’t worry about posting long threads. The more detail you provide, the better we can try to help you. Also, being able to talk about things can be very helpful! It does sound like all this worrying and negativity is affecting your life. No-one here is a professional, so we can’t diagnose you, but it does sound like you may have anxiety and/or depressive issues.

It’s also very common when we stress about work to avoid or procrastinate, making the stress temporarily go away, but then come back even more intense at times. As you know, the only way to stop this cycle is to do the work. Perhaps you could set a timetable of when you should do work, and set yourself goals as to how much work you should do (without overloading yourself!)

I’m the same with decision making, however, I have always been that way. It’s very easy when we are anxious to overthink things, and doubt our abilities to make decisions. This makes it harder and we worry about whether we made the right decision or sometimes the deadline for a decision passes. Sometimes, this might just be because of anxiety and negative thinking. Try to remember all your positive qualities and trust in yourself that whatever the outcome of a decision you make, you will be able to handle it- good and bad. You are in control here!

Though you might feel uncomfortable with the people in the floorball court, are there other places that you could go to instead? If you enjoy floorball, there is no need to stop participating in it, just because of your negative thinking. Also, when we are anxious and doubt ourselves we also try to ‘mind read’ that others think negatively of us too. But we will never actually know what other people think of us- most of the time, it’s just our negative thoughts. It can be hard when we feel low on energy, but it’s still important to make an effort of being active and engaging in social things with others. You may find that by isolating yourself, you would feel worse off than if you were to go to sports training.

I’m really sorry about the incident in the shower. I really hope that writing out the full story has helped you in a way. It’s very understandable that after having your privacy violated you would be shaken up and may feel like the world is different and people are untrustworthy. This may be the cause of your anxiety. I’m also sorry that it was stressful with different people pressuring you to report or not report the incident. That should’ve been made clear to you about what would happen, and depending on the laws in your area, maybe even left up to you to decide. I also understand that if the investigation is ongoing, this may be causing more stress in your life, than usual. Unfortunately, I don’t know how long investigations can check. Is there anyone you can contact on your case who could give you an answer?
Do you have many ways of dealing with stress and anxiety? When we get overwhelmed, we even begin to have physical sensations- we may have headaches, not be able to sleep, not feel hungry etc. Being able to deal with stress can help our bodies too. Try to schedule in time for yourself to relax and do things that make you feel relaxed, whether that’s reading or watching a favourite movie, going for a relaxing walk, playing video games. Anything that takes your mind off the stress and is healthy is good. You might also like to find ways of expressing your emotions by writing or being creative.

It’s good that your parents have been supportive. Don’t ever think that you are ‘whining’. If something is bothering you, it’s always worth talking about, regardless of how big or small it may seem. Since you feel you can’t always talk to your parents or friends about everything, I do agree with your sisters recommendation of seeing a counsellor. Does your university offer a free counselling service for students? That might be worthwhile checking out. Counsellors are confidential and there to listen to you. They can also help you learn more about your thoughts and feelings and how to improve your mood and deal with stress.

I really hope that things start to improve for you soon!

Take care