[Chaotic_]

Hi There,

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I would urge you to use your hobbies as a distraction from self-harming. I know that's a lot easier said than done.

I'm glad that you family cares and tries to understand. Have you seen a counselor? I think that could benefit both you and you family. Support from multiple people is really good for recovery, i.e. family, friends, teachers and mental health professionals.

Do you know why you are depressed, or is it something that happens? Also, with running away from home is there a root cause for that? Finding the roots to your depression is something to think about. as it also helps the healing process.

If you don't like being touched, let people know. Some people really hate it, and that's okay. As for sitting in the dark, people might see it as unhealthy and depending on how often you do it, it could be. I know though that sometimes when my anxiety flares, I just want to sit in the dark. I think in measures it's okay, so I wouldn't worry to much about that aspect.

Focus on getting help from counselors and using your support system. I know that it's really hard but you can do this. Feel free to message me if you want to talk to someone!