[Silvan]

Hi Kayden,
thanks for reaching out!

I understand you're scared and anxious in this situation. It must have been an unnerving experience, especially since you didn't mean to hurt that boy.

You said he won't respond to your messages - could you try reaching him again with message kept in a calm and respectful tone? Something along the lines: 'I am sorry if I hurt you during our meeting. I didn't mean to. Is it possible for us to talk? I would like to know what went wrong from your point of view'.

If he still doesn't respond, I suggest you talk to an adult. It could be your parent or other family member, but I understand it might be very difficult to speak with someone close to you emotionally. If so, is there a school counselor at your school? Talking to this person would be the best choice in my opinion, as they are objective, not connected to you emotionally, and they are experienced in dealing with such situations. Remember: a school counselor went through special studies or courses to gain knowledge and experience helping teenagers in difficult situations, they will not judge you, and if you are embarrassed - they have probably dealt with many similar cases, and as I said - they won't judge you.
An additional advantage of reaching out to the counselor is that you and the boy go to the same school, so the counselor could arrange a meeting with you two and act as a mediator, or at least talk to that boy themselves, if he cannot be convinced to speak with you.

What is more, I suggest you consider whether sex is a good idea. Firstly, depending on where you live it might be illegal to engage in sexual activity at your age. Secondly, limited knowledge of sex and its potential consequences can lead to unpleasant or even dangerous situations (even if you are educated on the matter, the other person(s) might not be!). Thirdly, if you do decide to engage in sexual activity, make sure to prioritise safety (for example using condoms for anal sex - it protects from STIs and anal microbes; or making sure the partner is willing to engage and knows the consequences).

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the situation to resolve well for you (and the boy). Please keep us updated and don't hesitate to ask if you have any further questions.

Take care!
Sue