[Jas]

If you haven't explicitly set out that you're dating, you're not dating (and certainly not in a relationship).
Beyond that, I think you probably really scared her by mentioning the future. I know that you are really excited about this and are apparently in a much better place to be making a commitment from, but it sounds to me like she isn't and that's something that unfortunately you can't push. Four months isn't a very long time - certainly not after four years.. it took me a year after my last relationship ended to consider anything beyond a date here or a hook up there, and while I'm happily committed now anything before would have been too soon and ended badly.

I guess I think that in plain terms: She doesn't want to hurt you. She likes you. And she's not ready to date you.

I'm sorry if that's not what you wanted to hear, but that's my take on it.