TeenHelp - Thinking about self harm

TeenHelp (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/)

- Self Harm (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f12-self-harm/)

- - Thinking about self harm (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f12-self-harm/t135333-thinking-about-self-harm/)

Thinking about self harm

I'm going to start off by saying I have never self harmed. Until recently I hadn't even thought about theiidea of harming myself. But recent events have made me crave it. I don't even know what I'm craving, just when I get angry or upset I want to do random shit like choke myself, bite my fingers until they bleed or claw at my skin. I recently lost all of my friends when I had a mini breakdown and confessed my love for a girl who I was friends with. Needlesstto say she didn't respond very. She started crying and said she couldn't look at me the same anymore and basically told me she never wants to see me again. My other friends saw this as patheticaas well as extremely disrespectful of me to put her in that situation so they told me to go away and they no longer reply to my texts. Then mmy parents started sarguingaagain and my dad left the house for a few days and returned looking likehhe was at a cheap bachelors party in los Vegas. They then stated they were getting a divorce. Then myxcomputer broke which was my one way of escaping everything. I have only left my room 3 times in the last week and a half (there is a restroom attached to my bedroom) and all 3 were for food. I just can't take the outside world anymore. What can I do to jump the pain so I don't do something I'll regret. I know that logically SH makes no sense but it's an urge. An itch I can't scratch and it's gnawing in the back of my kind all of the time

Re: Thinking about self harm

I'm sorry about what's been going on lately. I think it's unfortunate how you're friends are treating you right now, real friends wouldn't do that. I know it hurts to think about what's happened, but you can't let it affect you negatively for the rest of you're life. You can't let it keep you from living. Self harm may seem like a good solution right now, but it's not. There are better ways to cope with what's happened. I think you need to get out and talk to someone about what's happened. You've made a great first step by coming on here and talking to us. It's not easy to lay down everything that's happened.

Everyone goes through hardships in school, it's an unavoidable issue. I've had a ton, and sometimes I've lost friends because of them. It weeds out the people who are not really your friends and who will stick by you. It hurts a lot, but let me tell you, you will find better friends who will stick by you know matter what happens. You can't give up.

I think you need to just be yourself and do some things to get your mind off of what happened. Maybe pick up a few hobbies, focus on school work, etc. Try talking to some people who have always seemed really nice, but you never took the chance to get to know. You never know what could happen. Friends always begin as strangers, and until you talk to them, you'll never know.

I'm sorry about what's happened with your parents as well. Divorces are hard, and the fighting and everything is terrible as well. Just know that everyone on here is here to support you and here to listen if you ever need to vent. You aren't alone. When they fight and you feel like you can't handle it, just come talk to someone. We'll always be here.

I think it would also be a good idea to check out the alternatives list. Self harm is never the right answer. It's dangerous and you don't deserve to be in pain. Try out some of the alternatives. Not all of them work for everyone, but try to find a few that do work for you. :) You are strong enough to get through all of this. You can face the outside world. It won't be easy, but you can do it. :) My inbox is always open if you ever need to talk!

Re: Thinking about self harm

I definitely agree with what was said above; real friends wouldn't treat you like that. I know it can be hard to argue with friends, but truthfully, you're better off without people like that in your life. You deserve so much more than the way you were treated. Think of it this way: you dodged a bullet. It's better to see their true colors now than down the road. I know it can be more comfortable to isolate yourself but it would be more healthy for you to get out a little bit. Even if you just leave your room a little bit more often and venture into other rooms of the house, you are at least experiencing a change of scenery. You can gradually bring yourself out of your shell and I suggest looking into volunteer groups for your community or looking into other things you can do to meet people when you feel comfortable enough to do so.

I'm glad you know that self-harm isn't the right answer. Self-harm is addictive and you can put yourself at risk for severe injury or infection. Like it has been mentioned, I suggest you talk to someone you trust, call a hotline, or blog/journal to release your feelings. You should take a look at the alternatives thread that has been provided to you above. Can you pinpoint any sort of emotion to work with? Physical alternatives such as walking or running are often good for anger, for instance. As for another example, you might want to try holding ice or taking a cold/warm shower if you're feeling numb, etc.

I believe in your ability to get through this! I can tell that you're a really strong person. :)