TeenHelp - Triggering (Abuse): when does rape become rape ?

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- - Triggering (Abuse): when does rape become rape ? (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f13-rape-abuse/t134916-when-does-rape-become-rape/)

StrawberryPancake

December 13th 2014 08:50 PM

when does rape become rape ?

when does rape become rape ? a few years ago me and my boyfriend - (we're no longer together as it got messy) did it, at first i agreed to it, and we did it. half way through i asked him to stop it was hurting. he said no and that i needed to just loosen up but i kept begging him to stop but he didn't.. people ive asked online say its rape but im not sure because i did agree then asked him to stop and he didn't when does rape become rape ? as i did orginally consent but then changed my mind half way through ?

hocus pocus

December 13th 2014 09:02 PM

Re: when does rape become rape ?

Hi there,

What you've been through is rape. Even if you did initially consent, you later asked him to stop several times and he did not honor those wishes. Your ex-boyfriend is at fault for continuing despite you asking to stop. Here is a thread that can give you some more insight on that.

Have you talked to someone about this before? If not, I suggest you talk to someone that you trust about or a professional about it. It's unhealthy to keep your experience and your feelings inside your head; you need to talk about these things in order to heal. If you don't want to talk to anyone in your life right now you can refer to this list of hotlines. Perhaps you can also keep a journal or a blog to healthily express your feelings.

Take care of yourself and feel free to send me a message if you need anything. :)

¯|_(ツ)_|¯

December 13th 2014 11:00 PM

Re: when does rape become rape ?

I do believe this is rape, because you asked him to stop and he refused. Even though you initially gave consent, you took away the consent and told him to stop, and when you say to stop, the sex should stop happening. It should be over and the fact that you wanted to stop should be respected. That didn't happen here.

If this is upsetting or bothersome to you I do encourage you to reach out and get help, because you don't deserve to go through this alone. :hug:

Rejected again

December 14th 2014 10:54 AM

Re: when does rape become rape ?

Rape is always rape. If someone doesn't consent or if they say no it's rape. Both people have to actually say yes for it to be ok.

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