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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate you so much!!!!
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Re: Screaming thread.
I can't take us fighting. Our parents are already doing this and I want to cry.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I didn't make you mad so I don't have to do anything to placate you. I did nothing wrong. So I don't have to do anything. Maybe if I say that enough times I'll believe it.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Shut down emotions, they are stupid and unreliable.
I should make myself productive, efficient and optimized instead! Edit: I am stupid. STUPID! |
Re: Screaming thread.
I do definitely hate myself for even liking anyone. People are just too difficult that I don't want to be attracted to anyone. Women don't find interest in me at all and my difficult situation makes me not sexually attracted to men, so ever making relations with them are hard, so they are turned off by me. So I do hate being in love with anyone easily.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Every time I feel like I'm starting to get things under control, something else comes up and all the stress comes rushing back.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I've been so sick for the most part of a week, and I'm just so ready to get over this. I slept for 16 freaking hours straight because I've been feeling so badly, and now I can't sleep and feel worse than when I originally went to sleep. I just can't catch a break.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I
Want To Be Drunk and I want to steal a razor from the drawer |
Re: Screaming thread.
I have to keep going. You will be ok.
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Re: Screaming thread.
My cover may have just been blown. The one thing I didn't want was for my full or last name to appear in Google with my diagnosis next to it. Shared it in a CLOSED group, and someone put it on their timeline. I'm probably out there now. fucking awesome.
Lets assume for a second that I did bring that on myself. It doesn't mean I deserved all of what I got, and the disability that I have zero control over was still the main cause. Missed the call from the therapist's office. They can't technically hold me to an appointment I didn't agree to. I'd rather call back tomorrow than try to catch her tomorrow morning. The obvious solution would've just been to tell her I wanted somebody else on Friday. |
Re: Screaming thread.
Well, good job, Jordan. You just blew almost four months SH-free. And for what? Because someone said something triggering and you couldn't deal? You're pathetic.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I want to die. I can't take the world.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Regret agreeing to do overtime at a different store. I don't know how to get in, I don't know any of the staff or what they're like or how things work there and I'm scared of it.
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Re: Screaming thread.
i don't want to face them again. they had so much faith in me and i let them down. they'll ask me how this happened and i'll have to tell them i remained a subpar human being despite their efforts to make me less so
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Re: Screaming thread.
Ok, so I do well in exams, and?
I still never hate myself a bit less at all. Never. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I just need a night, one night were I can breathe and have some time for myself. I can't keep doing this, I need some time to recharge. I'm running on fumes and you just don't understand that.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I got fourteen hours of sleep and I am still exhausted.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Great. I drag myself out of bed early to get to PHP and just start vomiting once I get there and have to go back home. When will I stop feeling sick?
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Re: Screaming thread.
I don't want to be perfect. I just have two more days and then it will be okay. That's what I will believe.
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Re: Screaming thread.
How... did you not know... that this is an every day thing... I am literally like this every single day. What the fuck made you think I only experienced random sporadic bouts of depression? I have been passively suicidal EVERY SINGLE DAY for almost eleven years. And you're telling me that that's the first you've heard of that?
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate males. They suck. Fuck my life. You can't trust any single one of them.
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Re: Screaming thread.
You don't know anything about me. How dare you make assumptions like that.
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Re: Screaming thread.
"I yell because I care."
No, you yell because you don't fucking know how to not be aggressive. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I kind of feel as though it would be a whole hell of a lot easier to die. Everything is rather unpredictable at this point in time. Freaking out a bit. I guess you could say I am anxious but I am not?
Tomorrow will be a better day. I'll get sleep sometime tonight and I'll wake up refreshed. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I don't know if I should call this pain or discomfort but I don't feel right. My body is all tense and I'm uncomfortable. This better not be withdrawal from Lamictal. Fuck that shit. :glare:
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Re: Screaming thread.
Ugh. Ugh. Please don't be broken.
|
Re: Screaming thread.
The level of disgusting conduct, insensitive, ignorant comments, and insanity is so crazy high it doesn't even phase me anymore. UGH
They aren't even trying to hide the fact that they're RUNNING and she's being SO unbelievably impossible and disrespectful I CAN'T even. You're the only one still trying and we deserve to run too. |
Re: Screaming thread.
My. Wisdom. Teeth. Are. So. Uncomfortable. Oh. My. God. WHY IS MY MOUTH SO SMALL.
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Re: Screaming thread.
My throat has been awfully sore all day, and now I spilt hot wax all over myself and the room. I'm burnt and very fucking thing is dirty now, the walls, the floor, the sill, the windows, let alone food...
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Re: Screaming thread.
Sometimes I'm at a loss because I have no idea what to do about this entire situation. I feel so broken and I'm so sick and tired of feeling that way.
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Re: Screaming thread.
"Help me get over what I did to you"
Sounded like a good idea until I thought of that. Nooooo. Nooooot gonna happen. It'll end so badly if I do this. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I wish we could get along. Your never nice to anyone.
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Re: Screaming thread.
90% of customers today were either rude or were just so clueless that I was wasting so much time trying to baby step them through their order. So frustrating!!! On top of traffic on my way home. Just glad I'm finally home.
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Re: Screaming thread.
It's the time of night where I feel alone, scared, and broken. I can't handle this time of night tonight.
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Re: Screaming thread.
can i just like die right here, please thanks
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Re: Screaming thread.
Covering at another store tomorrow. What would have been a 10am start is suddenly an 8:30am start. Knackered as it is.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Nothing like having nightmares about being raped, held hostage, in a 130-mph car crash, sent to jail, turned away from a hospital because you don't have any money for a rape kit, having everyone you love tell you they won't help you pay, and trying to kill yourself. And C was in it too.
Wake up. Think of suicide. Go to sleep. Dream of suicide. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I feel trapped. Trapped in a never-ending loneliness in which no one will bring me out of. I miss people who are out of my own reach. I'm tired of this loneliness. I want out. I want to be dead and free from pain.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Breathe in and out, and hopefully it will be ok soon. We all have good and bad days.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I don't like feeling up and okay bc it always comes crashing down and I just hate it. I know every good thing I have goes away.
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