Re: Screaming thread.
 

I can't do anything right. There is so much stuff I want to do, but I know very well that they will never come to fruition. No one wants me to succeed. They would rather belittle, bully, undermine me, and overall, make me feel like a nobody. I'll never get married or have kids or experience alot of things most people experience before they are an adult (for example, first kiss, first relationship, etc.).

One day it will become too much and I will reach my breaking point.....

Re: Screaming thread.
 

My breathing has been bad the past few days and it's annoying because I have to start working on Monday. I am worried it will get in the way of me doing a good job.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I am pretty sure my anxiety is going to keep getting worse up until Monday. I knew this would happen which is why I ended up doing what I could to get things done before the weekend! At least I have my psychiatrist appointment on the 1st.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

No matter what I do or how hard I try, everything I touch just falls apart.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Anxiety is high right now.
I know what the trigger is and all that will fix it is time.
Time to realize things won't be as overwhelming as I fear but what if they are? What if I fail

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Forgot to put hours in right for next week, fuck graduation and practice cant work as much and im not even graduating this year. So less hours less money, fuck me. Now my brain is being an asshole I want to stop thinking about her. I was fucking fine, now its back again. I don't care about her truly its just because I'm lonely and my brain is trying to find any cheap remedy, even such as going back to that bitch. Best part is work training with her next week. Then I have the SAT this weekend. I'm ready to fucking leave, I'm tired of this shitty town and just about everyone in it.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

The closer I get to working the more unhealthy my ED voice gets.
I keep hearing a voice reminding be how much weight I could lose if I just skip a few meals.
It worked in the past ... but look what that accomplished? I got really sick and no one would take it seriously.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I don't know why I can't be normal. Things are going well and I had a suicidal thought. I started thinking it would have been better if I hadn't reacted so quickly to that event.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Get out of my head. Get. Out. Of. My. Head. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I think I might be getting sick. That's a great day to end the week since I start work the 4th and cannot miss the first 2 days

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I need to be okay with asking questions and turning something down if it doesn't end up working. I don't actually need it.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I am scared. Something is wrong but I don't know what

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I hate everything right now!

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I feel dizzy and sick to my stomach. The world is crashing around me. I am worried that you are sick. I am worried that my life will never be the same. I realize this is irrational thinking

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I wish you would talk to me about what is going on. I don't get this behavior

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I hate the fact that you're sitting here judging me. You have no right. You aren't better than me. You have no idea.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I hate people so damn much.


Certain degrees shouldn't be offered if there are no guarantees for money. DUDE really? Like, those degrees you are talking about are degrees that can offer a ton of money. The issue is the USA has a stupid education system and they require a shit ton of education....you have to go get a masters. In other countries a counseling degree is way fucking different, for example.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

In restless and just want to get the shopping done

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I have to stay up till 930 or 10 so I don't wake up too early since I have work.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Panicking a bit. I am sure it will be fine. I won't be late but should I bring the lunch box?

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I'm bored. I want to do something and be active.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

What if the only reason I want to keep fighting is so that I don't keep hurting you by hurting myself?

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Do I even matter?

Re: Screaming thread.
 

I can't fucking make myself see anything good about myself! Trying to force that when I hate everything about myself just makes me hate myself more for not being able to see what you think I should be able to see. I'm not good enough for recovery.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

What is it about me that guys do not like? Am I that ugly, fat, and disgusting? I am the ugliest, fattest, and most disgusting creature on this planet Earth.

Re: Screaming thread.
 

Ok my turn

I know you were lying about who you were talking to and I wasn't angry. Despite all the hurt you don't even know you've caused, I forgive you, but I'm disappointed that you left thinking I didn't know the truth. It makes me wonder, what else didn't I know?