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Re: Screaming thread.
You can see what day I sent that e-mail so don't hold it against me because you didn't answer for 3 days
I know this is bad, I'm hoping it's not as bad as I think. I just want to pass, I'm already delaying that, but I am NOT doing this again. The rest of this week and then one more week of class and finals and I can get a break after I find out how I did. I am so far over this class that I can't even tell you and I still have to go 2 more times and ace this final to even have a shot at a passing grade and then, pass or not, they still don't know what to do with me. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I fucking hate college.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Yeah if you could just piss off...that'd be great
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Re: Screaming thread.
some people just shouldn't exist!!!
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Re: Screaming thread.
How many times do I have to say "I'm fine" before you realise that I'm not.
You don't look hard enough. I'm a fucking mess, have you really not realised? Just because it's dark doesn't mean I haven't been crying. You just can't see it. Fuck off with your questions all the time! You don't know shit about how I feel, you never will. |
Re: Screaming thread.
GOD FRICKIN DAMMIT. i-i just wrote a whole mofo-ing post to help some kid. i quoted his post and actually bolded certain things and answered his damn questions with novel long answers and...as soon as i frickin hit the post button...BAM. teen help shut down. wtf.
so i copied the post i wrote, and went along to do my homework. when i exited out the window, i realized i needed to save my post in wordpad so i could post it the next day. when i pasted the definition of butter pasted instead of my fricking BIBLE long post. what. the. hell. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I just want to go to sleep.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I have forgotten what the word CONCENTRATION means :/
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Re: Screaming thread.
You have no idea how much I DO NOT want to do this tomorrow. As much as I love my friends and this class and the instructor. Even if I was prepared I just REALLY don't want to. I know i need the learning experience and this will probably be the safest environment possible, but I don't have to like it.
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Re: Screaming thread.
uurrgghh!!! This is insane!
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Re: Screaming thread.
1 thing
2 do 3 words 4 you You're a prick. |
Re: Screaming thread.
Have your own mind, oh my god.
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Re: Screaming thread.
You can't always rely on others; sometimes you have to be able to get things done by yourself.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I wish i could just come slap you! but it looks like all i can do is come and scream in this thread!!
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Re: Screaming thread.
LEAVE ME ALONE
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Re: Screaming thread.
I'm dying inside and no one can save me but myself.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Fucking hate this piece of shit!
I'm tired of it... Can't someone just let me die for once...? |
Re: Screaming thread.
I've realized whats one of the worst feelings, knowing that someone who you used to be closest to is slowly pulling away and what used to be long texts and late nights is now distant conversation and short answers. Knowing that they are slowly getting tired of you. I don't want this to happen and it hurts. a lot
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Re: Screaming thread.
That had better be a f***ing typo I kept track myself and every number on my sheet matches except that percentage. When I do it I get a passing grade that's about 10% higher so there had better be a REALLY good explanation. You don't have to let me move on to that, but you can't unfairly fail me so you don't have to deal with what it means. If I earn the points then you have to pass me. And don't give me that s*** about "choosing to do something about it" If 5 professionals including you have no idea how to fix it, and if you do you admit it won't get fixed overnight, I don't see how the student who has been screwing it up her whole life is supposed to know what to do and fix it immediately or have her career threatened.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Feel so worthless. Ughhh why do you do this to me??
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Re: Screaming thread.
I have a really bad headache and my whole body hurts.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Fuck life.....
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Re: Screaming thread.
My muscles really hurt from yesterday.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Fuck it all, fuck it all :]
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Re: Screaming thread.
I wish I could just die and get out of this shitty life. I wish someone would just shoot me in the head right now and end it. I wish that person could be me, but I just can't do it.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I just don't know who I am or why the hell I'm still living.
I honestly am just done with myself! I started crying, uncontrollably, at dinner. In front of my whole family. And I don't really know why, I think it was just everything. I can't even eat or swallow or talk or sing without feeling like my throat is being impaled. I am not pretty, nor am I talented, nor am I ever the first choice. I ruin other peoples' lives. I am not getting better at all and I want to not go to school ever again until this sickness goes away. I am so stressed with myself and would gladly throw myself under a bus if you asked. I was triggered for much of the day and couldn't stop thinking of why he chose Mimi over me. He chose her because I am a nothing. I hate that my grades suck I hate that I don't know what I want to do with my future I hate that Pat is driving me up a wall I hate that I won't blow my boyfriend I hate that I can't eat my fucking tacos I hate that its raining and I hate, HATE, myself. I could just do it. I could just cut myself. But I would ruin everything. Like I always do. You know, I see why people leave me. I wish I could cry more often, because obviously I need it. I bottle up my problems so much so that people don't abandon me anymore. Yet I feel so alone and I don't know why. I don't know why I am this way, or why one minute things can be okay and the next I'm falling apart. I just can't. I. JUST. CAN'T. HEAR THAT WORLD?? I ROYALLY SUCK! :'( |
Re: Screaming thread.
This is complete bull s*it and you know it. If you think I\'m taking it laying down you\'re wrong.
As angry and justified as I am in doing this, I REALLY wish I didn\'t have to do it alone |
Re: Screaming thread.
50% of teenagers are sad and depressed because love. 49.9% because of other problems. Im in the 0.01% where if they take your computer you go ape shit crazy.
They took my computer. I shall become violent. |
Re: Screaming thread.
Today is just an awful day. This week is going to be really bad too. I don\'t think I can do it.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I don\'t want to do this fucking assignment. I cannot FUCKING concentrate on it. Do you think I really give a damn about poetry explication or analysis in contemporary American Literature right now? But I have no choice. I have to. I have to because it\'s my goddamn final and counts for 25% of my semester grade. An A+, an A-, and a B+ might save my semester grade with a C if I botch this thing, but I still have to try. So sure. I\'ll pretend like a give a fuck about analyzing every word in that poem, or about the attitude of two of the primary characters in a play after their father commits suicide, or about women\'s rights in Victorian America.
The thing is, I do give a fuck. I give a very big fuck; school is my life. But right now I simply cannot push myself to want to do well. My professor was kind enough to grant me a two-day extension but I still have to finish the fucking thing by Friday because I refuse to spend my weekend smacking my head against a wall because I don\'t have the ability to concentrate. My professor knows I do good work, normally; he\'s seen how I write and knows I don\'t "slide by." Besides, he saw me in his office yesterday; I\'m very aware I look like shit all doped up like I am. But hey, it keeps me from randomly flipping the fuck out. So yeah. Let\'s just get this over with a soon as possible and turn the damn thing in. It\'s not going to be "A" material, but for once in my life I don\'t care about that. Isn\'t it great? The only time I am not a perfectionist is when I am going nuts. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I got what I wanted, but I still think I deserved more. I have NEVER been accused of disrespect of an authority figure in my LIFE and I\'m a week shy of 26. I keep my mouth shut and stay invisible and I get told to "reach out, we want to help." I get treated unfairly and have my career threatened for 2 YEARS, finally decide I\'m done taking it, stand up for myself and get accused of DISRESPECT and refusal to accept feedback that I feel ATTACKED by. I really can\'t win can I? Sometimes I wonder why I even bother. Invisible is SO much easier, I\'ve always known that. And people wonder why I don\'t listen! I could tell them the whole story of why I am this way, but I don\'t think they\'d care and even if they did I would get told that there was nothing they could do or that it was an inappropriate amount of disclosure. "Being unprepared for class is unprofessional" guess what, the fact that I was even THERE every class should count for something. You try producing 20 topics that are long enough for 20 minute sessions with restrictions on what you can use every semester for 4 semesters and then tell me you don\'t run out of stories!
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Re: Screaming thread.
You can\'t make someone want you. You can\'t make someone care about you. You can\'t make someone love you. But what you CAN do, is give your time, effort, care, and love to someone who\'s willing to return it. Move on from the negative and walk into the positive, my friend.
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Re: Screaming thread.
You may not know this, but everything you say hurts. Take today, you called me an \'attention seeking piece of shit\' when I was trying to help you. You don\'t understand. Those 5 words were the reason I left the classroom and why I was in the toilet crying. But you don\'t care do you? You\'re probably still proud of yourself for making everyone around you laugh.
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Re: Screaming thread.
If I don\'t find what I need to find soon, I am going to flip my shit here. This is ridiculous. There is no information on the topic anywhere, no matter where I look! Agh!
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Re: Screaming thread.
I feel so stupid right now :(
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Re: Screaming thread.
Been paying $27 a session for a semester and I just found out I could\'ve been paying $5 instead and my dad would never have had to find out! He didn\'t tell me it existed until I already had a relationship with the other professional. The only reasons I\'m not more pissed? It doesn\'t work out to that much of a difference and the cheaper option would\'ve meant students in training. The way I did it means I got somebody who already knows what he\'s doing.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Sometimes you need to let go. Just let go. Some things can\'t be fixed, saved, or recoverable. Letting go can hurt, but it\'s necessary.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Why does everyone want to interfere in my life.?!!?
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Re: Screaming thread.
I am literally sick over this whole situation right now. I can\'t even label my emotions and I can feel my dream collapsing again just in time for my birthday. Please tell me that I can do this in spite of that and that I haven\'t wasted 14 years of my life wanting and working amazingly hard at something that I can never have.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Just stop the freaking world, I want to get off. I don\'t want to be here anymore. This iOS freaking stupid and I can\'t anymore. There\'s no point. I\'m a freakin mess and I\'m fallig apart. Just please. I\'ve had enough
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