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Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
Some times I think I'm being a cry baby...
and other times I'm planning my own suicide and its gonna happen someday, I will use one of my plans one of these days, I'm not sure when though, I still have to plan that out. I'm never truly, truly happy... only when I'm around him I'm in love with my best guy friend... but I know that will only get me hurt worse then I already am |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I got him and you didnt!hahaha bitch! Put that in your pipe and smoke it!!!
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I still think about him a lot, even though I shouldn't, and I didn't deserve to be treated like that.
I'm an attention seeker I wish I was nicer. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I'm scared of needing anyone.
I'm constantly judging other people's motives. I really don't like how much I love people sometimes. Sometimes, I choose to be alone instead of with anyone. I could have plans, but, I just don't have the energy. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
i will wait forever for someone who doesn't feel anything for me.
im in love with being in love. i can't get over my biggest fear of getting my heart broken again. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I never thought i'd live to 16.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
My secret is that I'm too ashamed to say my secret.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I wish I had called you that night.
I'm sorry, I miss you. R.I.P. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I'm worried you haven't replied to me yet
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
Fucked up and still here...I'm standing alone.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
It hurt to not run into his arms after school today.
And maybe it's not even him I miss. Just the comfort of knowing I loved him and he loved me. I just need someone who cares. ...I still miss kiota. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
Even SI doesn't help me now.
No one'd notice if I took a pain killer or 11 from the drawer... It would be almost foolproof; almost too simple. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
Sometimes, I wonder if she'd be better off without me...
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I'm lonely...
to scared to say my real secret |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I've put on weight,so i haven't eaten for two days. =[
I fail. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I never wrote what i wanted to write in my blog.
im a coward |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I'm absolutely terrified of moving && I'm really not sure I want to anymore I love him. But I shouldn't, be cause I'm moving 4000 miles away. Sometimes I wish my parents went on holiday by themselves more often; I love the freedom my brother, sister and I have when they're not around! |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
Sometimes I never truely think its gonna be over.
Im so scared, This is not the end. Why cant I do it.. I want this more then anything.. I have no choice anymore.. Its too late |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I don't actualy like you. And I love him to pieces no matter how much he hurt me.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I kissed a guy in a truth or dare before *Cough*
--- I had sex with one of my teachers when I graduated high school *heh* |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I let him have what he wanted.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
My ed has taken over my life, I'm tired of fighting it and I'm sick of having to pretend day in & day out that I'm 'fine' when I feel like crap.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
~I wish I didn't text her when she got in that accident. I feel like it's my fault.
But sometimes I wish she didnt make it out okay. ~I wish i could just tell the truth! |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I'm afraid of going to hell. It's become an obsession. And I'm an Atheist.
It's easier for me to get close to people on line, because I can backspace anything I say that's stupid before ever hitting "enter". I act like I don't care what people think. But deep down I need them to accept me. I'm a compulsive liar. My list of secrets is endless, and I can't even name half of them. I've been lying since I could talk, and I know I can't stop. I figure it's too late anyways. And I've lied to you many times as well. I wish I could tell you all the things I've said which aren't true. I feel ready. But you would run from me so fast that I wouldn't even be able to say sorry. People say I'm intelligent, but I still worry that I'm not smart enough, even though I know I could be on the honour roll if I ever attended or studied for my classes. Though I still jump at the chance to out-do my honour-roll friends. And I hate them every time they get their report cards. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
For once I'm clear.
You scare me. Everything scares me right now but... things with me and you are different to all the others. You're so close to me it's scary. We're both so similar and yet so different. This is fucked up. I hope you make a decision soon. <3 |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I can't do this anymore! I can't pretend everythings alright. It's NOT!!!
4 weeks till i'm 20. I'm not going to make it. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
IwishIwouldoffuckedhimwhileIhadthechance.NowIgotta waitaWEEKtosemybabyagain Anditbother methatJohnielikedCLAIRE.aah.Gr damnpeople.andyouracoolperson?wtf.icantbeleiveidid thatcoffeethingtho.ihatemyself.diediediedie.
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Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I feel like I'm reliving my childhood. And when I have my slight flashbacks soon afterward, I feel like a zombie with a rusty serrated blade twisting in my chest. Sometimes it feels like someone punctured on e of my lungs, and it's painful.
I'm afraid of letting everyone down. And I can feel myself distancing from her, it always happens. She's really important to me, and I'm scared. I overdose on anything I can get my hands on every day, just so I can survive. Which is ironic. I cut everyday, just to ease the emotional pain. To bleed his dirt out of me. I used to shower for hours, trying to get the dirt and grime off of my skin. Most of all? I could change all of this. I just don't have the energy or motivation to. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I know this is just weird but I want to be pregnant so I know what it feels like, but then I dont want the kid or go through the child labor part.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I wish I wasn't so afraid to find out who I am without it. I don't think I'm treatable anymore and I've given up trying to fight it. I've lost friends to it, but don't believe it'll ever get me.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
i love you and i know at some point you loved me to weather you do now or not i will never know and dispite what i tell everyone and what everyone tells me i know you and her wont last forever or even much longer at that and when shes gone ill still be there and i will never leave you because you are the only love i know.
i miss you quite terribly and everyday it gets worse is this how you feel? come back :( |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
For some reason I still want to see him sometimes... Even though he shattered my life I sometimes go out of my way to see the guy who raped me. Then I totally regret it. I think it helps me stay calm when he talks to me or decides to tell me that \'we\'re going to do it again sometime\'... I never want that to happen again...But it still makes me sick that I would ever purposly see him. I also want him to do something at school. I want him to push me or hit me. I want to get him locked up so bad that I would put my own self in danger... I never ever want him force me to do anything though... and that will NEVER change. I\'m so scared that he is going to show up at my door when nobodys home... I\'m scared the rest of his gang memebers are going to catch up to me when I\'m alone... I\'m scared because I want to die...
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I\'m not sorry.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
- I care about you so much and it kills me you are so far away! Just when I’m starting to get over you, I fall right back in there again. I <3 you so much and it\'s destroying me!
- Nobody knows how I really feel. Nobody knows I’m slowly dying inside. I put others before myself. Why do I do this?! I need to take care of myself before others… - Why did you put me through that? It\'s how this emptiness all started… |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I might be moving to another country soon.
I can imagine being without my family. I cried the first time I tried to imagine life without my best friend. |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I feel like I can\'t breathe when you chain me down.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
Nail polish remover tastes bad.
|
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I have a pathetic crush on my ex-best friend, who goes through boy/girlfriend like crazy, and is way to good for me. I hate being around her now, because I think everyone can tell.
Or maybe I\'m just paranoid? |
Re: Dirty Little Secrets.
I dont understand how people like me, im a nothing!!
I got with my dad\'s best friend!! When i look in the mirror i feel pure haterd I want my ED to get worse, so il get thinner |
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