TeenHelp - Triggering: One day

One day

I climbed so far only to slip back down
I reached out for help only to drown within a drown
The sliver of hope, I can turn this around.
Maybe one day I can?

I've worked through the pain again and again
I know coping skills, distractions, and safety plans
I've been to therapy, and done self-help,
I've persisted through urges, when I wanted to cave out

I asked myself why should I try?
If others dont change, why should I?
If I do my part, what else do I do?
There's only so many times I can remain calm
I need support too

I tell myself, I want these skills
I want to fight these battles myself
and even if not now, one day I will

I tell myself, when one day comes
I will see just how far I've come
I may finally start to feel proud, too
Not only the my therapist and those who've watched me through
One day I will feel more than just the growing pains
I will feel the part of growth that makes it worth it in the end
Maybe one day I will manage my emotions and stress,
that no one would have guessed this once caused me distress
I may even blend in with someone who've never struggled within
But the difference between my journey and someone else's, is
Those who did not suffer with emotional regulation, wouldnt be equiped
With the painful memories, of those we trusted and betrayed us
Those who punished our suffering with more suffering.
Ostracized us when we were feeling alone
demonized when we were feeling like a burden
Shaming us more, blaming us more telling us, we deserved it all
One day I will have more emotional control,
but I know from now, what not to repeat to others.
I will know from now the power of compassion
And what happens when a person is deprived
That's not something that comes built in with having emotional problems
But I turn my problems into lessons, and one day I will these lessons will come in handy
I already started using them.