[Mallika]

Hello there,

Thank you so much for reaching out and sharing your story.

As Dez and Rivière have very nicely explained, you don't deserve to be in a toxic relationship like this one. The impression I'm getting as I read your story is that you are in a very uncomfortable position, caught between your boyfriend and his female friend - you want to leave yet some aspects are holding you back.

Let me emphasise that in situations such as the one you're in right now, your sense of worth takes precedence over everything else. You don't have to stay in a relationship where you feel you're being used only for sex. You don't have to stay in a relationship whereby your boyfriend's best friend is reading through all your chats and trying to constantly intercept your actions. You don't have to stay with a boyfriend whom you feel is cheating - that is absolutely unfair for you. You don't have to stay in a relationship where there's no love, mutual trust or understanding. And like Dez and Rivière have correctly said, you are not responsible for his life. In my understanding, he is threatening you by saying that he will take his life if you leave him. Yet, he doesn't give you any respect or treat you like a man should his girlfriend.

I was in a toxic friendship before. I made the tough decision to walk away and cut off all contact with my previous best friend. It was all for the better, because my life had become a mess when I was in close interaction with her. Though there is value in mending relationships in some cases, there reaches a point sometimes where the damage done is irreparable. It seems that way for you and your boyfriend. Hence, the only sensible thing to do is to walk away - break up with him. Sometimes, the only way to be liberated from a sticky situation is to cut off the source of all trouble. I would advise you to cut off contact with him and his very toxic and inappropriate best friend. You will realise that you will be so much happier.

I emphasise that you don't deserve to be in a relationship like this. There is so much more out there that you can do and explore, there are so many good people out there too in whose company you will find true joy and solace. Life is complex as it is; we don't need to stick around people who are making things incredibly tough. Leave him, girl - it's for the best. You are important, you deserve better. Don't be daunted by his threats. You have to do you

Take care and feel free to PM me if you have any questions!