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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Thumbs down I need advice - June 19th 2009, 08:59 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I see myself going down and I don't know what to do about it. I try to tell my counselor I'm suicidal and doing horrible. In the past month I've walked into on-coming traffic, self harmed quite a bit, am sleeping well over 15 hours a day and then I wake up and just don't want to do anything. I've downed half a bottle of cough syrup with codeine in it, and I'm still here. I still manage to wake up. So obviously I'm suppsoed to be here still, so how can I make it bearable? My counselor just keeps telling me to wait it out. I've distanced myself from everyone I love and care for, and I've finished writing my suicide note today. So I'm here, asking...what do I do?
   
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Re: I need advice - June 19th 2009, 09:06 PM

Throw away the suicide note. You have your future to live for. You have tomorrow to live for. Take it easy. Everyone has the future to live for, because your future is one of the few things you CAN change.

take care, and feel free to PM me.


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Re: I need advice - June 19th 2009, 09:37 PM

Only you can decide what to do. No one can decide for you. Sometimes it seems like it would be easy to simply have someone who made every decision for you, so that you wouldn't have to make decisions like this yourself. But it's not really that complicated, is it?

You have two options. You can live, and give yourself a chance to pull through all that your facing right now. You can accept the fact that while things are hard right now, they can get better and will get better in the future, no matter how long it may take. You can realize that even though life is rough, it's also full of moments that make all of the suffering truly worth it. You can realize that you are worth it, that you're obviously meant to be alive, even when things become tough for you, and that you won't be going through these same problems for forever. That you're a strong person, and you're worth it.

Or you can give up. Sure you won't suffer anymore, but what about all of the happy moments you'll be giving up on? What about the people who love and care about you, and who will be affected if you kill yourself? What about the strength that you have to pull through this, that you'd be throwing away? You may see a lot of positive things about suicide, but when you think about it, those positive things about ending your life are completely meaningless when you compare them with all of the negative things that go along with suicide.

I won't give you a bunch of bologna and tell you that things are going to get better over night. But I will say that while suicide might end some of the problems you're currently facing, it will cause even more. If not for you, for the people that you care about, and who care about you. So is it really worth it?

I really believe that you can get through this, and I'm not the only one who does. I think you just need to work on believing it yourself. Because you are a strong person, and you are worth it. But suicide is not.





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Re: I need advice - June 20th 2009, 05:51 PM

I'm trying. I'm really trying. I don't want to give up yet, but I'm close to giving up. Everything that is happening right now, I can't do anything about it. I have no control. It feels like my whole entire life, every aspect of it, is out of control and it's really taking it's toll on me.
   
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Re: I need advice - June 20th 2009, 06:11 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by escape_thereal_world View Post
I'm trying. I'm really trying. I don't want to give up yet, but I'm close to giving up. Everything that is happening right now, I can't do anything about it. I have no control. It feels like my whole entire life, every aspect of it, is out of control and it's really taking it's toll on me.
But you are in control. I understand that it's easy to feel as if you've lost all control of your emotions and the things that happen to you in life, but you definitely haven't. The truth is that you're a strong person, and you're perfectly capable of pulling through this. Just because things may not be going the way that you planned or would like them to go doesn't mean that they have no hope of getting better. You may not be able to control everything in life, but you can control your future. How? You can simply keep on living, so that you can have a future. And there's always a strong possibility that that future will be a million times better than what you are living right now.





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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