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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
ladyninetyfour Offline
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Unhappy My best friend... - August 3rd 2009, 08:26 PM

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Hey
I'm so worried.
My best friend is like the sister I never had. I have two blood sisters... my best friend, she's like the sister I chose. She's beautiful, and funny, and amazing, and she's ALWAYS there when I need her to hold my hand. She bought me lunch everyday at school when i was anorexic/bulimic, and made me eat it until I got better. She's the one that sits on the other side of the toilet door when iv locked myself in a cubicle throwing up, and then crying on the floor, holding my hand through the gap at the bottom of the door. shes the one that runs into the loos where the teacher is yelling at me for making a scene and she can hear me crying. She's the one that kisses me on the cheek when everyone's looking, and will say 'I love this girl' even though people tell her she's a lesbian and a freak for being friends with me. She's the one that catches my tears when I cry. She's the one that picks me up when I fall. She's the one that hugs me so tight when I'm down. She's the one that dances the square tango with me in the middle of school. She's the one that holds me back when I'm about to go hit the art teacher cuz she's pissed my best friend off. She's my beautiful sister.
And I haven't been there for her. I haven't seen her for a month. I went to hospital because I overdosed, then I went on holiday, then I was living at my aunts... and I just haven't seen her in a month. Her family have got her down, school got her down (i wasn't there for the last two weeks), and now her boyfriend has got her down. He didn't mean to but he pushed her too much into sexual stuff, she's not even quite fifteen. He's apologised sincerely, and he's a good guy, he just went to far. But now my best friend feels like a slut, and she's not stopped showering obsessively for weeks, and she says she feels dirty. I've been self harming since I was eight. And she's never, not once, done it... Until the other day. It wasn't serious, she didn't cut herself, she just left bruises.
I've completely broken down... she's my best friend in the whole world. And I don't know what to do. My whole world is crashing. I don't know how to make her feel better. I can't see her until monday - 10/08/09. She reassures me as I cry to her on webcam because I'm worried. She says she'll be okay. But I know she won't be. She just doesn't like to see me upset. She reassures me and it should be the other way round...
Tell me, somebody what should I do? xoxox


Where there's love, there's hope
You cannot destroy me!
xoxox PunkRoxS9 xoxox


Last SH: 03/08/09
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: My best friend... - August 3rd 2009, 08:36 PM

Hey bex

God I didn't know it was that bad I feel awful. Just remember it's not your fault because you weren't there and honestly be a good friend just be there but don't do anything she wouldn't want you too. Be her best friend you two will make it through together you can help each other just remember to not drag each other down when she is sad tell her a joke make her laughif she needs someone to talk to listen and im sure she will do the same for you. You two are the goodest kindest friends to me and i dont think i would have made it through this year without you so be there and get through the tears and laughter together.

You guys will always be my best friends and I hope we never grow appart so theres my thank you to you for all you've done for you and i hope i can return the favour we have to have a girls day out and forget about the bad things and focus on the good.

Your friend
Foxy Boxy aka Emily
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: My best friend... - August 3rd 2009, 09:56 PM

Uhm.. hey.I joined this site because of my mate, PunkRoxS9, better know to me as my best friend. I'm the girl she was talking about... oh god.. i feel so self conscious writing this... right. anyways. i feel okay... and if it wasn't for Bex being Bex i would have done more than bruise myself. talking to her.. telling her ill be there, always. it gives me strength. i have a purpose in life. my purpose is Bex. i would do ANYTHING, give up ANYTHING just to see her smile. i know i dont have the best life in the world and i know it is still a whole lot better than a lot of peoples, which actuallly makes me feel worse... its like... why am i moaning? i have a house, a huge garden, a pool, a family. i feel like a lot of the time i need punishing. ive never self harmed before i started pinching myself at the weekend (1/08/09 - 2/08/09).i dont know why i did it... i dont like my home life or my school life.. the only place that there is really left to retreat to is in. in me. just sit and listen to music. let my body work on automatic to tidy my room or talk on msn.i feel like i could talk forever... sit here and write away my problems... if onlyy life was tht easy... i tried keeping a diary but i hated writing it down for me to seee every time i opened itso i gave up on it...i cant use the chatrooms... i want to but i cant... my computer wont let it for some reason... its quite annoying actually. i dont know how else to use this site, but bex showed me this that she wrote.. so this is me trying to use it. i dont know if this is going to be a reply at the bottom of the screen or if its going to have its own page or what...i actually only started writing this because i wanted to say something important... and its about the most important thing in my life... i wanted to say that whatever may have happened to you, whatever you may have done, you didn't deserve it, no-one deserves to go through suicidal emotions and depression. I have been an agony aunt to all my friends and to complete strangers, i know about a lot of stuff some people may not imagine, there are some things i havent even told bex, and i know for certain, that not a single one of them deserved to go through what they went through. a lot of the time they are just victims of other peoples anger or depression, u could have nothing to do with it, just be friends with the person going through it, it doesnt make you any less important, everyone is affected by everything.i got to go nowbut please please please dont blame yourself, dont go blaming everything and everyone else either. accept u need help and take tht help.aliciaxx
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
ladyninetyfour Offline
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Re: My best friend... - August 12th 2009, 02:49 PM

Hey
Well after her ramble, I'd like to point out that: None of xaliciatx 's ramble had anything to do with this. I am seeing her on 15/08/09 yaya! I can't wait. However, she is still (to my knowledge) self harming - ie biting herself. And she may be splitting up with her boyfriend. And I don't know what to do.
xoxox Bex xoxox


Where there's love, there's hope
You cannot destroy me!
xoxox PunkRoxS9 xoxox


Last SH: 03/08/09
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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
.Brittany. Offline
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Re: My best friend... - August 12th 2009, 03:08 PM

Hey Bex

I'll address the new issue..

It's always hard when you find out that a friend so close to you is self-harming. I haven't had to deal with a friend like that, but one of my friends did for me. What she did when she found out, she was so concerned, that she went to the Child and Youth worker at our school, and talked to him.

Now they had asked to remain anonymous, which he did keep quiet. I eventually went every other day to see him. He was great! So maybe you could think about doing that for your friend? If you ask them to keep you anonymous you can. Ever since my friends did that, I have loved them even more, because they helped me, and I think that it could help your friend as well!

I'm sorry that she might be splitting up with her boyfriend. Something like that is always hard, and she will definitely need to lean on you until she feels better. When and if this happens, the only thing that you can do is be yourself, as you two are already great friends. Let her lean on you for support.

If it gets too much, let her know. Or come talk to us! Your a really strong person, and you should continue to be there for each other. You both can get through this! I know it! Don't forget, a tub of ice cream and a best friend helps ease a broken heart!

I hope that you have fun with her on August 15th!
PM me if you need anything
Brittany



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and smarter than you think.”


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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
ladyninetyfour Offline
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Re: My best friend... - August 20th 2009, 01:17 PM

Thanks Brittany.
We had a great time, things were really good but unfortunately I couldn't be there for her birthday party... And things didn't go to plan for her. I'm quite angry with her over something, but at the same time I am still worried about her.
xoxox Bex xoxox


Where there's love, there's hope
You cannot destroy me!
xoxox PunkRoxS9 xoxox


Last SH: 03/08/09
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