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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Ella.x Offline
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I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 12:41 AM

to keep posting on here. You're probably all sick of me by now.

I don't know where to turn though. I feel so trapped. All I can do now is cut myself. I can't trust anyone. I pissed off everyone who I could have trusted. I'm so close to ODing again. I don't know what to do to feel better. I'm sick of the anti-depressants, I'm sick of the psychiatrists. I hate how everyone just referrs me to someone else beacuase they dont know what to do with me anymore. I cant do it. I dont know what to do.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 12:59 AM

It's okay to keep posting on here and letting this all out. We would never get sick of you. Everyone at one time or another feels trapped, and the only way to be able to break the mold is to let yourself recognize that you need the people are you and they need you. Have them help you, they do care about you even if they don't show it or have made mistakes. People may not be able to understand why you are the person that you are and so they get confused and and even know they want to help they don't know how so they become distant and sometimes unreliable.


Suicide is not the answer, you are intelligent and I beleive that you will make it through this!


Take sometime to yourself and then talk to everyone about how your feeling.


Good luck stay stong!
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 01:14 AM

Hey Ella,
I agree with Katie completely. It may feel like you have no one to turn to or no one cares, but it's not true. We are always here for you and will never get sick of you posting here. We want to help you. The only reason people are referring you to others is because they care. If they feel like they can't give you what you need and help you through it, they find someone who they think can. If they didn't want to help you they would just give up, and that's not what they are doing. I understand how all the psyciatrists and anti-depressents can be difficult, but they are just trying to help. Hang in there, it will get better. Stay strong.
~Alessa


Whatever it is, chances are I've been there.
If I can make it out, you can too.
   
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 01:16 AM

Please keep posting here. It might seem like suicide is a good option, but it is not. You can do it, and you will make it through this.
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*Jen* Offline
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 04:54 PM

Hey Ella,

It is good you are posting here so never ever be sorry for posting. It is so hard to trust people and I know how you feel about the whole trust thing. I have big problems trusting people and it takes me ages to actually trust someone. But sometimes you do have to take that risk of trusting someone.

It is horrible to just feel passed around and that must make you feel unable to trust people even more. Have you told the psychiatrists this? If not then I really think you should. It isn't fair that you are just passed around especially since you find it hard to trust people.

Don't give up though. You are going to get through this and you are worth so much more than a bunch of pills. Stay strong.
   
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Ella.x Offline
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 07:28 PM

I went to my doctor again today. She put me on sleeping pills because I can't sleep. I'm exhausted all the time. I fall asleep in lectures. I hardly even go to most of my lectures anyway. I no longer see the point in anything. It's so much effort to even get out of bed anymore. I just want to dissappear.
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 09:05 PM

Don't give up Ella.
How long have you been using the sleeping pills?
Maybe they just haven't kicked in yet.
Once your body gets used to them I'm sure you won't be as tired.
Stay strong.
I know you can hang in there.
PM me if you need anything,
Alessa


Whatever it is, chances are I've been there.
If I can make it out, you can too.
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
*Jen* Offline
keep smiling :-)
Outside, huh?
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Re: I'm sorry - October 20th 2009, 11:07 PM

Stick at it Ella. The sleeping pills could really help then you might feel a little better. You can get through this so don't give up
   
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