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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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jinxed angel Offline
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Exclamation Is it ever gonna get better - November 9th 2009, 01:44 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I don't know why this is happening again.
I thought that it was getting better but my depression is coming back, everyone comments on how tired I look, but even my closest friends can't see that I am hurting.
My family doesn't have time to notice, and I've never been important to the family anyway.
I don't know why I am feeling this way again, and as much as I want to tell someone, there is no one to talk to.
There are no adults I trust enough, I dont want my friends to think I'm cutting again, because I'm not, not yet atleast, and I really don't want my family to think that either.
I don't want to start thinking about suicide again, I am already tempted to cut, but i don't allow myself too.
I feel hopeless and I just want it to go away, even though I know it won't.

Help me?



I'm so tired of pretending everything's okay, my tears are starting to show and my smile is fading away.
PM or VM me if you need me, I'm here if you need someone to talk to or to just listen. I also have most messangers if you want to talk on one of those.

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Re: Is it ever gonna get better - November 9th 2009, 05:02 AM

Hey Siera! (:

Sorry that you're not feeling too well lately. Sometimes, it being winter can really get folks down. Another thing to just keep in mind is that typically, nights are a little more difficult than days to just push through, so try to preoccupy yourself at night and be around friends and family members that love you and care for you - this can definitely help you to get through the hard times.

Honestly, you need to talk to a school counselor if you're feeling like this. Yeah, it's nice to be able to talk to family or friends (or people you don't know online ), but sometimes, you just have to take it upon yourself to put yourself in more capable hands - such as those of a professional. Whether or not you trust them can't possibly be the deciding factor--unless you get to know them, of course you're not going to trust them, you know? It can't hurt, and you can always request that they spend some time briefing you on the limits and exceptions of confidentiality before you start meeting with them and then go from there.

I'm so impressed with your self control about the self harming! You're so brave and strong and just stubborn (in a really good way) for resisting the temptations to self harm. So give yourself a pat on the back and keep up the GREAT work! You're doing beyond amazing.

I hope things shape up soon! Hang in there.



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jinxed angel Offline
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Re: Is it ever gonna get better - November 9th 2009, 09:43 PM

Winter has never been a problem before, and it happened for a long while last time i started getting depressed. I know night usually seem harder than days, but days I think are harder for me.

And today it got worse.

The school counslers already know about my self harm and after than, teachers knew because someone told the counslers and they told the teachers. My school is awful with that kind of stuff, too small to be quiet i guess.

I'm not brave. Just smart.

Thanks for the advice



I'm so tired of pretending everything's okay, my tears are starting to show and my smile is fading away.
PM or VM me if you need me, I'm here if you need someone to talk to or to just listen. I also have most messangers if you want to talk on one of those.

  Send a message via AIM to jinxed angel Send a message via MSN to jinxed angel Send a message via Yahoo to jinxed angel  
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