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Life17 Offline
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my soul is drained - January 22nd 2010, 02:37 AM

My nephew died this week and its been like the worst thing ever to happen so far in 2010. Ive been upset this whole week this WHOLE week and my own best friend havnt said a word to me. Went to basketball practice hoping that if i excersise I could clear my mind ended up walking out on the team bc they are a bunch of attitudes n bullshit. I have had enough. Im HURT im so hurt and sad and mad that its just draining my soul. I feel like the whole world is on top of me. I wanna go and hide in a fuckin small corner and never come out. Ive been upset in my life time but never been this upset. I wish that god would just kill me now so that I want have to do it. Ive been thru the storm Ive been thru it all and now Im laying my life on the line.
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thisiscourtney Offline
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Re: my soul is drained - January 22nd 2010, 04:05 AM

What you're going through must be extremely difficult and it might sound impossible, but you should try looking at things from a more positive viewpoint. I'm not saying forget anything ever happened because it's natural to mourn at a time like this. More time should be spent celebrating his life, though. No matter how old your nephew was, he'd probably want for everyone to be happy. If you died, wouldn't you want the people you loved most to enjoy life rather than spend it hiding in a corner?

As for the best friend thing, is there a reason your friend is ignoring you? Maybe they just want to give you space, but if it's for another reason then maybe they aren't the best friend. Try talking to your friend and if they act hostile, then they obviously don't want to talk. If they respond, then I think the best thing to do would be to open up. Let them know that you need help.

You wouldn't be better off dead. You have a life. Use it to the best of your potential. I suggest visiting the Death and Grieving Boards where you'll find a number of people that are going through pain similar to yours. Good luck. I hope you find hope.

Waitin' for my ruca.
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Jacksonian Offline
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Re: my soul is drained - January 23rd 2010, 03:27 AM

The pain you are going through will pass. Unfortunately not as fast as you would like it to. It will take time but you have to hold on.
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