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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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bellarox08 Offline
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Exclamation It's Over - May 12th 2010, 03:43 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My best friend (who i think of as my twin) nd i have planned the date nd everything of when we are gonna do it all we have to do now is figure out how to do it. . . . no1 can help me anymore or her thts why we are doing it together


Before you Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark but there were stars points of light and reason… And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.
Edward Cullen, New Moon, Chapter 23, p.514
   
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Re: It's Over - May 12th 2010, 04:48 AM

Evie,
If you two are best friends you should be thinking of ways to live it up together, not die together! There are so many things to live for, so many things to do as friends. In your hurt state right now, you may not see it, but there are ways to make things better, probably several that you haven't thought of, and in time you will be a lot happier. If one thing doesn't work you just have to try another. Right now instead of letting your friend pull you down you need to pull her back up. You must be strong right now. You can do it.
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Re: It's Over - May 12th 2010, 05:09 AM

Hi Evie,

I am sorry to hear that things have been so rough lately. Obviously a lot has been going on if you feel the need to hurt yourself in this way. It's unfortunate that you are feeling this hopeless. Obviously though, a part of you still wants to be here. I truly believe that if this were not the case, you would not have posted this thread. Maybe you are looking for a reason to remain alive, and this is a last attempt to see if someone can give it to you.

The truth is, though, that no one can give you hope but yourself. It's okay to turn to other people for support, but can anyone really convince you not to kill yourself? I don't really believe that they can. Sure, people can present you with the facts, list all of the reasons why you should remain alive. But in the end, you are the one who makes the decision. There's really nothing stopping you.

Yet you're still here. You could have killed yourself months ago, years ago. You could have been seriously injured or your life could have ended naturally. You could have given up hope years ago, and performed the task that you are planning on completing. Nothing was stopping you back then either. But clearly, something did. Something has kept you living all of the years you have been alive.

I'm going to take a guess and say that this isn't the first time you've felt hopeless. This has probably been going on for awhile now. So what's gotten you through to this point? What's given you the extra push, the will to stick it out and see where life takes you? What's given you hope? If you'd been hopeless for the past few months or years, you wouldn't be here. It's as simple as that. If you didn't have hope, you wouldn't be alive to read this right now.

Every moment you are alive, is another chance. A chance to get through this. You've proved that by making it this far. All these months, maybe years, of pain, but you've made it through. And how, after all of that, can you honestly say that you are hopeless? You've proved yourself wrong time and time again.

Hope never leaves us. We leave hope. We decide that we are a lost cause, that nothing can help us. We close our eyes to the second chances that life throws our way, and we make the decision that we're simply better off dead. I could sit here trying to get you to open them, to realize that are thousands of things that give you hope everyday, that there are thousands of reasons to live.

I'm not going to do that, though. This is your life, this is your decision. If you want to believe that you have no reason to live, no one can stop you. But if you want to see the truth, if you want to open your eyes to all of the reasons life continues to throw your way, then the only person stopping you is yourself.

Sure, life sucks. It wouldn't be life if it wasn't full of endless crap we fear we'll never get over. That's just the way it works. Life gives us depression, pain, hurt, neglect. The list goes on. But life also gives us something else. The power to see beyond. The power to look beyond the pain, hurt, neglect, depression, and see that there is still beauty in life. There are still so many other things that we should be happy to be alive for. That we should live for. You have the ability to see beyond the pain in life. You have the chance to get through this. The only question is, will you take it?

Part of you is still hopeful, I really believe that. The part of you that is still hopeful posted this thread hoping that someone could give you a reason to stay alive. None of us here have the answers, or the exact reason why you should choose not to kill yourself. But I do know you will always have hope. It's up to you to believe in that hope, and to let it have a place in your life. It's up to you to realize that you do belong here for a reason. No one else can do that for you.

I'm always here if you need to talk things through. Hang in there.





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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Re: It's Over - May 13th 2010, 01:57 AM

Yes this is definitely not the 1st time i guess this is somewhat true but the only reason i posted on here is because the lil hope i have is fading so much! the nly reason i stay here is because of my 2 best friends but we are all faling apart nd i was hoping some1 could try to show me or convince me but i realize they cant n in the end ur right its my decisin nd i think im going to do it i do not know if i can wait till the date we planned though thanks i guess 4 trying to help but its over just like the name of my post!!


Before you Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark but there were stars points of light and reason… And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.
Edward Cullen, New Moon, Chapter 23, p.514
   
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Pour the Teapot Offline
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Re: It's Over - May 13th 2010, 02:50 AM

please don't go, i'm going to friend you and keep checking back to see if you make any more posts, and if you stop making posts i'm going to assume you're dead and sob. if you have a friend so devoted she is willing to die with you, then she should be willing to live with you as well! if this friend is encouraging this, then she is not a friend worth dying for. you are a beautiful person, never forget that. and if you still have enough hope to post on here, then that means you have enough hope to live!

living is hard, it's scary, it's tough, and i know sometimes it doesn't seem worth it but believe me it is. think of all the amazing things you would miss out on if you died: all your partners, your graduation, your wedding day, your children, all the friends you would have, finding out who you ARE. and think of all those tiny moments that just make you glad to be alive: when the sun shines warm upon your face, when you hear someone and realize that you love the sound of their laugh, first realizing you love someone, petting an animal, feeling raindrops splash on your shoulders, it's all worth it!

i don't care how screwed up your life is, things ALWAYS get better. i absolutely promise you that. tell your friend you AREN'T going to do this. Tell her you are going to find help for the both of you. and stay true to your word, tell your parents, a teacher, a trusted adult, ANYONE who can help you. and please, don't go. we're all here for you, please don't make me sob by killing yourself.
   
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