Am I still suicidal?

[Childish Giggle]

Okay, so I was suicidal when I was about 8-9 years ole. I hated home, school, grandma's house, and all the people associated with these places. Then slowly it changed, by the time I was 12. And after loads of things happened I wasn't suicidal anymore. But last night I was thinking, and I came across the fact that, I have never looked down from a balcony without thinking that i want to fall. I live on the 3rd floor, but I have friends on 6th, 7th floors. And I don't remember one time when I have looked down without thinking about letting go and falling down. Though I don't want to die.
Am I suicidal? Or is it normal?

[Kitty.]

Hey,

Since you have been previously suicidal, then that's probably why you think that way. Feeling suicidal is something that you have experienced, so thoughts like that will happen. Dictionary.com gives the definition of suicidal.

1. pertaining to, involving, or suggesting suicide.
2. tending or leading to suicide.

It doesn't sound like you are suicidal since you don't want to die. Wanting to live is the opposite of suicidal. I'm glad that you want to live. I hope this helped.