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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
cynefin Offline
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Unhappy My gym teacher is triggering me - September 7th 2012, 08:10 PM

I am beyond hurt right now. So I know it's the second week of school. And this is going to sound bad, but I've missed three days. Two for doctors appointments, and I missed yesterday because my anxiety was just too un managable. All of my teachers have been really nice and helpful to get me caught up. My ASL teacher is letting me present my project privately during lunch. One teacher hasn't been so helpful, and that's my gym teacher. You know how every year, you get that one teacher who is a pain in the ass? So today, I was suppossed to go in for lunch to make up the pacer. I wasn't feeling well and I was beyond scared that I'd pass out, or worse. I decided to stay at lunch with my friends in an effort to calm down. My class right after lunch gym. My locker is right by the window where the teachers watch us change. As I'm finishing changing and putting my stuff away, she comes up to me. She's like, "So you forgot to come in today?" I didn't want to tell her the real reason so I told her I was making stuf up for other teachers. So then she says, "We set it for friday, and you didn't show up. What are we going to do about this?" I told her I didn't know yet because I wasn't sure if I was going to stay in her class. And she goes, "Well your grade is really low right now and it's your fault that it's going to stay this way until you come and make it up." I watched her go back into the room and through the window I saw her talking about me. This is when I started to cry. I didn't hear her talking about me, but I read her lips. I also know she was talking about me because I saw her put her three fingers up, indicating that I had missed three days like she had done to me before. I get that she doesn't like me and that I'll never be good enough for her, but she doesn't need to rub it in my face. She has no clue what I go through everyday to live this life not for myself, but for those around me. If I could have, I would have committed suicide already. She makes me want to rip my skin into shreads to punish myself. Whenever I see her, I get a panic attack.


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 7th 2012, 09:19 PM

I'm sorry you're struggling so much, but skipping out on make up work and lying about the isn't going to help anything. If you didn't feel well you should have gone in and told her that, or gone to the nurse and then told your teacher the truth.

In a way she's right. I don't agree with the tone in which she went about telling you these things, but you are in control of your grades, and have to deal with the consequenses of your actions, which in this case means making up your work when you miss school and getting confronted by your teacher for skipping your work without telling her more than once.

She can't give you a grade for work you don't complete, in a way it's that simple. She doesn't know the whole story so in her mind she's going about this the right way. I don't know how accepting or understanding she would be if she knew what's going on, but it's better to tell her or at least talk to her than to keep dodging her. She'll probably find out eventually anyway. There are always going to be people who don't understand or don't work with you as much as you would like them to, but avoiding them isn't the answer.

I don't think she dislikes you, I think she's just trying to get you to understand that you can't avoid things that you don't want to do and expect there to be no consequences. I'm also guessing that the fact that you blew her off twice means that she was frustrated.


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 7th 2012, 09:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kate* View Post
I'm sorry you're struggling so much, but skipping out on make up work and lying about the isn't going to help anything. If you didn't feel well you should have gone in and told her that, or gone to the nurse and then told your teacher the truth.

In a way she's right. I don't agree with the tone in which she went about telling you these things, but you are in control of your grades, and have to deal with the consequenses of your actions, which in this case means making up your work when you miss school and getting confronted by your teacher for skipping your work without telling her more than once.

She can't give you a grade for work you don't complete, in a way it's that simple. She doesn't know the whole story so in her mind she's going about this the right way. I don't know how accepting or understanding she would be if she knew what's going on, but it's better to tell her or at least talk to her than to keep dodging her. She'll probably find out eventually anyway. There are always going to be people who don't understand or don't work with you as much as you would like them to, but avoiding them isn't the answer.

I don't think she dislikes you, I think she's just trying to get you to understand that you can't avoid things that you don't want to do and expect there to be no consequences. I'm also guessing that the fact that you blew her off twice means that she was frustrated.
The nurse's office was closed, so going there was out of the question. I didn't tell her because I didn't feel like she'd understand or that I could trust her. With my ED, I don't eat all day long and I'm faint at the end of the day. Running didn't seem like the option.

I guess she is right, but she didn't have to talk about me right in front of my face either. I'm the quiet kid, and loud obnoxious teachers who favor students don't mix with me.


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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 9th 2012, 10:54 PM

I know that it seems like all of this is pretty unbearable and it doesn't help that your teacher is being so hard on you, but I'm sure it's just because she doesn't really understand. Instead of lying about why you missed, the best thing to do is set your teacher down and explain everything that is going on. If you don't feel comfortable talking to her, maybe you can talk to your counselor who can help you work it out with your gym teacher. I know how tough it is to deal with the stress of school when dealing with anxiety and an eating disorder, but I also know that it's not impossible. I believe in your ability to get through this, and I know that if you try talking to your teacher or a trust adult, it will make things better. If you ever want to talk more about any of this, feel free to message me <3
   
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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 9th 2012, 11:11 PM

Hi there.

I can understand your teacher, if I am honest. Her job is to ensure you receive quality education in order to achieve the results YOU want and need so that you can actually do something with your life. But, how is she meant to help you get those grades when you never turn up for lessons and what not? And she doesn't know the correct reason why because you lied to her. And I know that telling people is really hard, but to your gym teacher, you're missing lessons with excuses that aren't good enough and for her to teach you and help you get good grades, you need to go to the lessons to learn. I think you need to talk to her or talk to another teacher in school such as your head of year and make the gym teacher aware of the problem you're facing because if you don't, this is going to carry on. You will carry on getting into trouble and you grades will carry on slipping.

Like I said I know this is hard but this is in your control. Until you do something about it, it is not going to change. And if your school know about whats going on for you, they might even be able to put some help and support in place for you to help you get through this.

I hope you're well,
Jessie


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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 13th 2012, 07:11 AM

I m gym user on regularly basis so i quite know about these kind of stuff.I know that it seems like all of this is pretty unbearable and it doesn't help that your teacher is being so hard on you, but I'm sure it's just because she doesn't really understand. Instead of lying about why you missed, the best thing to do is set your teacher down and explain everything that is going on.
   
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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 13th 2012, 07:47 AM

Hello,
You could always talk to someone about how you feel about her, or confront her, perhaps with a few friends with you. or, you could write her a note and have your mother sign it. If it is your wish, and your mother agrees, she cannot dispute and cannot make you do things which you don't want to.

Keep strong,
Jay.


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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 13th 2012, 07:58 AM

Hey there,

Would it be possible for you to get a doctors note excusing you from her class for the semester? I think that you are correct in saying that with your ED a PE class might not be the safest route to go. If you cannot get an excuse from her class maybe you could get a doctors note that allowed you to go at a self pace; self pace is basically where you do not have to run unless you are up to it medically etc. I know that when I was in PE, due to my medical issues (I.E asthma etc) I was able to obtain a doctors note for self pace. Although, I will admit that one of my PE teachers was very understanding about this and the other was not. It could be the first step you take in trying to work on figuring out what you need to do in regards to your PE class.

Now, it will probably take a while for you to get the note so please try sitting down with your teacher and explaining to her that you are having medical problems. If you need to have a parent go with you. Let her know that the day you were scheduled to make up the missed classes you were not feeling well so you could not make it; if she does not listen have a parent talk to her or another teacher or someone else that might be on your side.

I know that some teachers can be difficult and when that is the case you have to do whatever you can to plead your case. But, whatever you do please do not harm yourself because it is not worth you; you deserve so much better than that!


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Re: My gym teacher is triggering me - September 15th 2012, 09:29 PM

Hey Everyone Thanks for the advice. My medicine side effects ended up effecting my gym performance and I got switched out of the class. I'm now taking childhood development instead.


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The mountains are calling and I must go.
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Nature does not rush, yet everything is accomplished
-Lao Tzu
Memories made in the mountains stay in our hearts forever
Move the body, quiet the mind
   
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