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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Abbi22702 Offline
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How should I keep this promise? - August 2nd 2018, 01:30 PM

I have cut myself about 6 times since around two days ago. I made a promise to myself that I will NOT cut until these ones start healing...now how do I keep that promise? Knowing me, I will most likely have cut again before I go to bed tonight. Thanks!
   
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Re: How should I keep this promise? - August 3rd 2018, 03:22 AM

Hi Abbi!

I first want to say that it is really great that you are trying to resist the urge to self harm. Wanting to avoid cutting is the first step toward recovery, so this is great!

Do you know what it is that is triggering you to self harm? If you know what is triggering you, it may be easier to try and solve some of the problems that make you want to cut in the first place. For example, is there something particularly stressful going on? If you're not sure, that's okay! One thing you can do to potentially find out what is triggering you is to keep a journal. When you're feeling triggered, make a note in the journal with information such as the day and time, where you were, what you were doing, and how you were feeling. That way you can look back and see if there are any patterns or things that may be triggering you and work to solve these issues. The other bonus is that sometimes writing out our feelings can help make us feel better! If you still can't figure it out or would ratherOne not do this though, it's okay!

Do you have anyone to talk to or spend time with? If you want to talk to them about what's going on you can, but if not it might at least boost your mood to be around other people, plus it's harder to self harm when you are around others.

One thing I do is try to keep myself busy. That way, I'm putting off the self harm, and might have lost the urge to do it by the time I'm done. You don't have to do anything extreme. It could even be cleaning or rearranging your room.

Do you find anything relaxing, whether it's a type of music, a scent, or something else? Is there any way you can do it to help you feel better or relax?

This is our Alternatives section. This page lists different things you may be able to do while you have an urge. It's broken up into categories such as "Distractions" or "Dealing with and expressing your feelings." There's even a category suggesting a rewards system!

Remember that no matter what happens tonight, you can get through this. This doesn't have to be an end, and I know there will come a time where you can become self harm free. It takes time, but you will get there!

You can do this!

-Dez


Let it come and let it be...

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Re: How should I keep this promise? - August 3rd 2018, 05:47 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Melancholia. View Post
Hi Abbi!

I first want to say that it is really great that you are trying to resist the urge to self harm. Wanting to avoid cutting is the first step toward recovery, so this is great!

Do you know what it is that is triggering you to self harm? If you know what is triggering you, it may be easier to try and solve some of the problems that make you want to cut in the first place. For example, is there something particularly stressful going on? If you're not sure, that's okay! One thing you can do to potentially find out what is triggering you is to keep a journal. When you're feeling triggered, make a note in the journal with information such as the day and time, where you were, what you were doing, and how you were feeling. That way you can look back and see if there are any patterns or things that may be triggering you and work to solve these issues. The other bonus is that sometimes writing out our feelings can help make us feel better! If you still can't figure it out or would ratherOne not do this though, it's okay!

Do you have anyone to talk to or spend time with? If you want to talk to them about what's going on you can, but if not it might at least boost your mood to be around other people, plus it's harder to self harm when you are around others.

One thing I do is try to keep myself busy. That way, I'm putting off the self harm, and might have lost the urge to do it by the time I'm done. You don't have to do anything extreme. It could even be cleaning or rearranging your room.

Do you find anything relaxing, whether it's a type of music, a scent, or something else? Is there any way you can do it to help you feel ]

is our Alternatives section. This page lists different things you may be able to do while you have an urge. It's broken up into categories such as "Distractions" or "Dealing with and expressing your feelings." There's even a category suggesting a rewards system!

Remember that no matter what happens tonight, you can get through this. This doesn't have to be an end, and I know there will come a time where you can become self harm free. It takes time, but you will get there!

You can do this!

-Dez
Thanks for your support! I actually was doing great, I went and saw friends until around 11:30 (I'm 13 so that is a pretty big deal, and pretty late for me!!) And came home and found a dead animal on our driveway.

I don't know what kind it was, but I came inside, cut myself and cried in the bathtub. I kept telling myself I should die, not the animal.

Again though, thanks for you support! Oh! And I had to delete part of your comment, or it would not let me quote it.
   
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Re: How should I keep this promise? - August 3rd 2018, 02:35 PM

Dez gave some great advice and I hope you found it helpful. It sounds like you had a nice time with your friends but it is unfortunate that you found a dead animal in your driveway. Seeing that can be bothersome especially if you are an animal person.

It can be easy to feel like something should be you instead of something or something else, such as you feeling like you should have died instead of the animal. Though it can be difficult to see this, that is not true. You're here for a reason and you deserve to be treated kindly.

Know that you can always pick yourself up and dust yourself off and try not to harm yourself again. Luckily there are plenty of opportunities and ways to work on yourself when you're trying to stop self-harming.


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Re: How should I keep this promise? - August 3rd 2018, 03:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by cynefin View Post
Dez gave some great advice and I hope you found it helpful. It sounds like you had a nice time with your friends but it is unfortunate that you found a dead animal in your driveway. Seeing that can be bothersome especially if you are an animal person.

It can be easy to feel like something should be you instead of something or something else, such as you feeling like you should have died instead of the animal. Though it can be difficult to see this, that is not true. You're here for a reason and you deserve to be treated kindly.

Know that you can always pick yourself up and dust yourself off and try not to harm yourself again. Luckily there are plenty of opportunities and ways to work on yourself when you're trying to stop self-harming.
Yeah, animals are kind of my life! Thanks for your support.
   
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