TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives


You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
LostInsideofMe Offline
Shadow-in-the-Background
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
LostInsideofMe's Avatar
 
Name: Britta
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Location: State of Delusion

Posts: 22
Join Date: July 14th 2010

Question Not The Ouch! Kind - December 19th 2011, 02:38 AM

Hey Everyone, and thanks for looking at my thread. :]

I'm just trying to get some background info on some stuff and I have no idea how to even phrase it so I'll tell you what's going on.

Ok, so I'm 17, been on my own for a long time. I have a slew of horrible events in my history. I don't have any family that want anything to do with me. Right now it's just my bf I'm living with, and I'm dependent on him for living. I'm thinking about just getting up and leaving, I'm mentally distancing him from myself and I feel helpless to stop it.

I've been known to do this before, just get up and leave everything and everyone. I've done it several times since I was 13.

I feel like it hurts me, and I do it on purpose as well as physical self-harm, to cut off from family and friends in a very drastic way. It leaves me alone and empty, and the pain I'm causing the ones that love me hurts me too. I still carry the guilt and pain from all the other times.

It's almost like an adrenaline-type rush to even think about disappearing, because I love him so much.

Help?
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Blair Offline
<3
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
Blair's Avatar
 
Name: Blair
Age: 24
Gender: Chick
Location: This moment

Posts: 491
Blog Entries: 13
Join Date: December 7th 2010

Re: Not The Ouch! Kind - December 19th 2011, 02:51 AM

Britta, honey, I think it's really brave of you to open up and be honest about all this girl! I know how hard it can be to talk about such personal stuff but it's a huge step in the right direction. I'm not trying to ask you to disclose anything you're uncomfortable with, but you'd mentioned having some traumatic events in your past. In my experience my desire to sabatoge close/loving relationships often had a lot to do with some really repressed fear and insecurity that I'd learned from my abusive past. Sometimes running away, getting easily bored in relationships, being uncomfortable with commitment can be a defense mechanism. If deep down you're scared of getting hurt or abandoned or you don't really believe that you are loved or that you deserve the love you receive from people, you might try to wreck the relationship or just straight up ditch the person you're with. If any of that resonates with you, I'd suggest that you stick it out and if you aren't already, find someone who you can start to trust with talking about your past and the effect it's had on you.


Just Keep Breathing
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Ambedo. Offline
I'm as sane as I ever was.

Outside, huh?
**********
 
Ambedo.'s Avatar
 
Name: Sam
Age: 26
Gender: Female

Posts: 3,585
Blog Entries: 26
Join Date: July 19th 2011

Re: Not The Ouch! Kind - December 19th 2011, 03:16 AM

Like Blair said, it's great that you're opening up about all of this. It shows that you recognize the issue and are ready to take steps to stop it! I definitely know how it feels to want to distance yourself from people -- I've been known to do it myself. Have you talked to your boyfriend about this? If there's a specific reason that you want to run, it's something the two of you should talk about. Maybe you'll be able to work through it together. As for the rest of the people you've distanced yourself from: do you have any way of contacting them? If you do, you might want to consider giving them a call or shooting them a Facebook message. Apologize for the way you hurt them and explain the reasons that you left. Honestly, the fact that you're reaching out to them will probably mean a lot to them.


wanderlust consumed her;
foreign hearts & exotic minds compelled her.
she had a gypsy soul
and a vibrant heart for the unknown.
-d. marie
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
kind, ouch

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.