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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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Was I molested as a child? - September 6th 2018, 11:31 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I remember when I was around 9 or 10, me and my sister would experiment with each other. She was around 10 or 11(we're a year apart. She's older). I remember us humping each other but nothing else. I didn't tell anyone when it was happening because i didn't want to get us into trouble. We thought that it was okay(can't really say that she thought because i don't know). It stopped when one day I went over her house and i wanted to do it with her and she told me know because it was gay. By me being so young i didn't understand. This has not affected me in anyway. Im not mad at my sister. I love my sister and would do anything for her. She's the only sister i have.

Scratch the part when i said that this has not affected me in anyway. I few years ago i had a bad dream. I remember being on this train i believe and all of a sudden i started saying no no no as i was waking up. I don't know if that has anything to do with this situation but I did have that dream.
   
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Re: Was I molested as a child? - September 7th 2018, 08:00 AM

I'm going to honset, and friend and I also did excatly that. And i just did a google search to see if its typical and its seems like its normal. Im no expert though.

I guess to debate whether it was molesting is age difference and whether you consented. At around those ages 9-12 you get curious, so you try it out. To be honset, i didnt know other people did this. So the big question is: did you consent to it? Not entirely sure the dream is related to the event but theres always the option of typing dream symbols in the internet. Its kind of fun to do. "no no no." could mean a few things.



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Re: Was I molested as a child? - September 7th 2018, 12:00 PM

From what I understand, child on child sexual abuse is when one older child (who knows what they are doing) abuses another. Typically when there is something and the children are one to two years apart, it is considered experimentation.

It is hard to say whether or not that dream is related to you and your sister. Saying no as you wake up could mean a lot of things, as dreams can get weird sometimes. You did say you and your sister wanted to do it, so maybe the dream had to do with something else? Try not to over think it but trust your gut too.


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Re: Was I molested as a child? - September 7th 2018, 12:22 PM

I agree with the above.

Legally, there is usually a significant age gap (in the UK it's 5 years age difference between perpetrator and victim, I think) for abuse to happen. And most importantly, the abuse occurs when one child knows what they are doing (and not doing it out of curiosity or experimenting). Otherwise, if you and your sister are similar ages, both young, and were doing it out of curiosity and not because your sister had more sexual knowledge than you and was abusing you for her pleasure, then it may not be considered abuse.

Child on child abuse does happen and it can be difficult to figure out if something was playful experimenting or something more. When this happens, I think it's best to go with your feelings. And whatever you feel is fine for you- there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to feel about this.

As for the dream, I agree that it may be unrelated. But it's also okay if you feel the dream was unusual or affected you in some way. Dreams can be weird like that.


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Re: Was I molested as a child? - September 8th 2018, 01:34 AM

Thanks Guys! I was worried that she did.
   
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