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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
cleostar09 Offline
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Why would she just lie like that? - December 16th 2009, 09:59 PM

This might turn out to be just a rant but i gotta get this out.... ok so my younger adopted sister (15) is claiming that my little brother (8) raped her. She must have told her school counselor because she got called down to the principle's office. When she got there the cops and CPS were waiting for her. they asked her what happened then called my mom at home. Now this utterly pisses me off because she is DEFINITELY lying... again! Yes i said again. She tried that same lie this summer. CPS got called and the whole family was interviewed... it was a mess.... Long story short she confessed to lying about the whole thing. I'm pissed because she has the nerve to try it again. My family has been through ALOT! Individually and together. We don't need this too. Not only that she has the nerve to lie about something as serious as rape. i was alomost raped in middle school and haven't been the same since. I take this very seriously and i just don't understand what she could possibly gain from this.... I'm just really confussed ans hurt. I mean he's my baby brother. And i'm pretty sure he doesn't even know what sex is yet. otherwise he would ask someone... That's just who he is... Why did she lie on family?


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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 17th 2009, 12:10 AM

Don't want to upset anyone reading this, but it seems really unlikely that an eight year old could actually rape a fifteen year old. I know it's possible, it's just a really odd thought. Are they completely buying what she's saying? Maybe she just wants the attention?


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 17th 2009, 01:24 AM

U know i wud honestly say mabie she isnt in some crazy odd way,
but i dont see how an 8 YEAR OLD CAN EVEN RAPE A 15 YEAR OLD. they r what?
7 years apart? it probley is possible but i mean, usually 8 year old boys r never into sex until they say at least when u r in 5th grade. (i know young huh? i only know this from our health class we take every 2 years and thats what they said) so he cud possibly know what sex is i mean, with t.v. and the media and hearing stuff and all. but still,hes only 8 and even if he was thinking about it i doubt he cud even try to rape a 15 year old. i mean, hes probley way shorter and has got way less body mass and she probley is way taller and stronger and has way more weight to stop him from doing that to her.
have u tried to talk to her about this? if shes doing this then there is most likely a deep reason for why. i lied all the time from kindergarten all the way up to 4th grade. heres the reason why: wanting attention. trying to be cool, and just plaine funny.
i wud try to talk to her and just ask her if its true or not, if she says yes then i wud start to ask her questions about everything that happened between her and your brother like, what did he exactly do to u and stuff?
i wud also talk to some of your family members about it u trust. becuz your brother DOES NOT NEED THAT. HE IS SO LITTLE, AND FOR CPS AND THE POLICE AND STUFF TO COME TO YOUR DOOR AND STUFF. I MEAN, THATS VERY OVERWHELMING FOR SOMEONE AS YOUNG AS HE IS AND MAY EVEN DESTROY RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN HIM AND YOUR SISTER. I CANT IMAGINE IT NOT BEING LIFE TRAUMITIZING FOR HIM. i wud also talk to your 8 year old brother about it too.
pm me whenever u need to.
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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 17th 2009, 01:12 PM

It sounds to me like she's desperate for attention. It sounds cliche, but she may feel like saying this kind of shocking stuff might be the only way to get people to pay attention to her.

You should talk to her, and let her know why this is such a horrible accusation and what it puts the whole family through and ask her why she keeps claiming it's true and then admitting it's a lie. You might also consider getting her to talk to a counselor to help her figure out why she's doing this.

Also, you should talk to the 8-year-old. Let him know that everyone knows it's not true and that he's not going to get into any trouble for her lies. He definitely doesn't deserve being questioned for something he didn't do.

(And as absurd as it sounds, an 8-year-old could potentially rape a 15-year-old. There would have to be some very unusual circumstances, and I really don't think that's what happened here, but it could possibly happen.)
   
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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 17th 2009, 03:35 PM

Hey Annastesia,

Maybe there is a reason she is saying he raped her? Talk to her, ask her what's going on, because something is clearly wrong. Some times people will invent stories, things that didn't actually happen, to cover up something that did happen, or is happening. She could just want attention, but there is a good chance that there is something else wrong.

She might also think that he did rape her, or someone else might have, and she might think it was your brother. Now hear me out. Sometimes if you have been raped or hurt by someone, you have nightmares and flash backs about it. However, nightmares can be confusing, because one moment you'll be dreaming of your best friend, and the next you'll be dreaming about getting raped again. So sometimes it's confusing as to what actually happened. Just try talking to her, don't let this ruin your relationship with her.


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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 17th 2009, 03:43 PM

Given your sisters age and the family situation, there is probably something bigger behind her having to lie about this kind of situation. If she feels deprived of attention or feels that her family doesn't care about her, lying about a serious situation like this will clearly get her the level of attention she is missing.

It may also be possible that she has no understanding why she lies about this kind of thing. There is probably something that went on with her friends or that she heard at school to lead her to this.

I know it's easy to be angry at her but this may be the time when she needs someone on her side, to figure out what the bigger issue is behind all of this. If she feels like someone is truly interested in what she has to say, she may admit to lying and it can go from there.
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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 18th 2009, 09:23 PM

Thank you all for your help and support. I'll try to take your suggestions into the situation but it is very hard to confront her. IDK but I kind of don''t want anything to do with her. I know it sounds horrible as the oldest but I feel like I need to protect my brother from her. IDK but one thing I did fail to mention is that she has Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. If you don't know what it is it's where the birth mother has drank so much that it affected the fetus and the fetus has some disablilties after birth. That does play a large role in this situation because some of the effects are not understanding the long term consequence of things they do or say. I'm not saying that is an excuse but it does play a part... IDK but she just went to get pap smear to see if anything happened and the doctor (of course) didn't find anything, so everyone knows that she is lying now. I just don't know what's going to happen now that it's divided the family...


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Re: Why would she just lie like that? - December 19th 2009, 01:29 AM

It isn't horrible you feel like you need to protect your brother. He's pretty much the biggest victim in this situation so I can understand why you want to be there for him. It may be hard to confront your sister, but rather than confronting her, just let her know you are here for her. It attention is all she needs then I'm sure she'll be willing to open up to you. Help her to understand how serious this is. If you don't feel comfortable doing it, ask another family member. I think it is important she knows exactly what she did wrong before it happens again. Try to keep your head up although I know it may be hard. It's ok to be upset with her, but also realize this is also probably hard for her. With a bunch of people questioning her and upset with her when they found out she was lying, she is probably even more scared now.
Stay strong,
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