TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Ginny Weasley Offline
Banned
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Ginny Weasley's Avatar
 
Name: Savannah
Age: 23
Gender: Female

Posts: 5
Join Date: April 11th 2010

Question abuse - April 12th 2010, 12:35 AM

I need some advice here...My mom is always yelling at me or my brother for something,my dad is too,or cussing at us,and they are always fighting with each other.She always says she wants a divorce and it scares me. I am a 14 year old girl,and i have 1 brother and 2 other sisters.Sometimes,if they get mad enough at us they will hit us. Mostly,its words though. A teacher asked me if i was ok and i eventually told her,and the cps was called.Me and my brother had to talk to them,and we lied to them,i dont know why. I guess i didn't want to hurt my family or my sibilings. I feel like i let the teacher down and other friends that know about it. It hasn't gotten any better.Is it my fault they arn't getting along? Should I not have lied? I need advice please. Thanks
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Member
I've been here a while
********
 
ShimmeringFaerie's Avatar
 
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Posts: 1,990
Join Date: March 22nd 2010

Re: abuse - April 12th 2010, 12:53 AM

No, it is not your fault. Your parents yelling at you and fighting with each other is not your fault as all, it is problems that they are having themselves. Please don't ever believe someone who tells you that your parents fighting is your fault, even if they say it themselves. It is often easier to blame someone else for our own problems, but it is wrong and not fair on you.

And no, you shouldn't have lied, but I understand why you did because it can be really scary facing CPS. But you need to tell the truth or else you and your siblings could get hurt. I know you might not want to talk about it, but can you give us some specific examples of what your parents do? Like, do they smack you on the bottom like a child or do they actually punch you? Either way, they really shouldn't be swearing at you or hitting you. I think you need to go to your teacher again, explain to her that you got scared and lied to CPS, and ask her what you should do now. She might ring them again and this time, you should really tell the truth. You and your siblings should not be living in an environment that makes you feel unsafe.

PM me if you need to talk .



PM me!

Dreaming about the day
When you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
Has been here the whole time.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Ginny Weasley Offline
Banned
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Ginny Weasley's Avatar
 
Name: Savannah
Age: 23
Gender: Female

Posts: 5
Join Date: April 11th 2010

Smile Re: abuse - April 12th 2010, 04:31 AM

I know i shouldnt have lied,but...No I dont feel unsafe.Its just really annoying. They mostly hurt us with words...they MAYBE hit us on the bottom like 1ce every like,year.Im not really aroung them much,nor is my familsoo...too many activities like swimming,track,ect,. Thanks for writing back!
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Member
I've been here a while
********
 
ShimmeringFaerie's Avatar
 
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Posts: 1,990
Join Date: March 22nd 2010

Re: abuse - April 12th 2010, 04:45 AM

Okay, just remember that hurtful words can do far more damage than physical violence. I still think you should go back to your teacher, who obviously cares very much about you, and explain the situation. Tell her exactly what happens in your family. She is the expert and if she thinks that there is a serious problem, she may get CPS involved again, for your own safety. If it isn't a very serious problem, she may organise a meeting with your parents and/or your school's counsellor. You are only 14 and living in an environment like that for the next several years, even if it isn't technically "unsafe", can be really hard. With constant yelling, it can be hard to concentrate on school and may impact on your studies. Please ask someone for help again, for your sake and your siblings'.



PM me!

Dreaming about the day
When you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
Has been here the whole time.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Casey. Offline
Dance with me
I can't get enough
*********
 
Casey.'s Avatar
 
Name: Casey
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Location: Somewhere in my mind

Posts: 2,343
Blog Entries: 337
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: abuse - April 15th 2010, 04:15 AM

No, it's not your fault that your parents fight. Parents fight, it happens, although sometimes it can be way too much to handle. I know divorce sounds scary, but it actually might be best for your parents, because sometimes our parents fall out of love with each other, even if they still love us a lot. It gets to the point where they can't be around each other anymore, and it's not healthy for them, or for you. So sometimes divorce is for the best, even if you really don't want it to happen. It might not. I come from a 'blended' family, so I can understand the fear of divorce.

Words can be extremely hurtful, and they can do damage, but the best thing to do is to let them roll of you like water.Don't argue or fight back, just let it go, but remind yourself that those words were said in anger and are not true.

Just hang in there.


She whispered to her own reflection "I will be strong."

"I am not what has happened to me.I am what I have chosen to become."- Carl Jung

"If ye harm none, do as ye wish."

Sometimes things just happen.


Smile through the tears.


PM me

  Send a message via Yahoo to Casey.  
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
guv11 Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
guv11's Avatar
 
Age: 27

Posts: 35
Join Date: January 8th 2009

Re: abuse - April 16th 2010, 12:52 AM

dvore isnt a bad thing, my parents recently divored, and is alot better now,

because they arent married, they actually talk to eachother, my brothers and sisters never spoke to eachother, everyone would just hide in their room...

but now everyones happie, thers nno more awkward silences, or screaming, our families alot closer, and eeryone is less stresed, im even doing better in college since then.
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
Ginny Weasley Offline
Banned
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Ginny Weasley's Avatar
 
Name: Savannah
Age: 23
Gender: Female

Posts: 5
Join Date: April 11th 2010

Re: abuse - April 16th 2010, 03:38 AM

OK, thanks everybody for responding!
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
abuse

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.