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Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
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Name: Anthony Colin Tall
Age: 19
Gender: Male
Location: Midvale, Utah
Posts: 11
Join Date: July 10th 2009
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Previous abuse affecting my present -
June 8th 2011, 10:03 AM
From about 6 years old to 15 I had been abused by my stepfather. You know, typical stuff. Smack me around about everyday, a few times he would come home drunk and beat me something fierce. Talking about it doesn't bother me, it's the random moments when the memories surface and I feel like a powerless child. It's made me have to leave school, it makes me afraid of people much smaller than I am. Do the flashbacks and memories ever fade? I'm starting college and I don't wanna have to deal with this.
"Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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♪ itchin' on a photograph ♫
Junior TeenHelper
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Name: Ella
Gender: Female
Location: Australia
Posts: 208
Join Date: August 15th 2009
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Re: Previous abuse affecting my present -
June 9th 2011, 01:55 AM
Hey Anthony,
I'm so sorry to hear about what you went through. I was emotionally abused by my parents growing up, the worst of it happening when I was 14 - 16. I had such a hard time letting go of the memories, so I definitely know where your coming from. Even after the abuse stopped I was so traumatised by all the recurring memories/thoughts, I actually thought I would never be able to stop thinking about it! But good news..I'm 19 now, and although every now and then something will remind me of what happened, it doesn't consume me like it used to, and doesn't hurt me nearly as much to think about. I think a big part of it has to do with moving on. I haven't forgiven my parents, but I have come to the realisation that what happened is in the past, it wasn't my fault, and I can't keep letting it affect my life. It takes everyone a different amount of time to move on, but don't worry I'm sure you'll get there. It's something you can't try to speed up unfortunately. For me it really helped disassociating myself from it for a while...I went travelling and didn't see my parents, friends or home where it happened for a few months and it really helped. So starting college might actually be a really good thing for you, being in a new environment and all! In a new place/being around new people you don't have to feel powerless or any of those things, you can have a fresh start and be yourself! Not the version of you that the abuse created if that makes sense! Just stay positive, and you'll find a way to deal with what happened and move on. Good luck!! xo |
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