im so confusedd!!!!!!!

[jaii]

i was fine, everything going ok.
then the other day i had a flashback, a really vivid one, and realised that when i was younger, my brother raped me.
i had completly forgot.
i didnt know what was going on becuase i was only 4 or 5
and he was gently, kissing me, but then he pushed it too far and raped me.
people keep saying what if it was a dream,
but i know it wasnt.
it was real.
im scared of him now.
but he doesn't know that i remember.


what should i do ????

[keepbreathingkeeploving]

I'm sorry that happened to you, hun. Best thing to do would be talk to someone you trust about it, a good friend an adult. Someone who will be able to help you through it, and allow you to process what happened. Sorting out how you feel and what is best for you. You need someone to support you, and be there. Just try thinking positive. Though you can forgive, it may be hard to forget. Whatever you do, keep your head up. You can get through this <3

[Le bonheur*]

Originally Posted by sophaa

people keep saying what if it was a dream,
but i know it wasnt.
it was real.
im scared of him now.
but he doesn't know that i remember.

Hey there,

I'm sorry this happened to you.

People say it was just a dream because the memory can indeed make things up and confuse you.

In class I watched a documentary about a young woman who had a happy family. The father was a Pastor. When the woman was about 19 she felt as though she needed therapy for everyday life problems. The therapist used a hypnotic method (I'm not really sure what they did exactly, it's much less common today; this was from YEARS ago) and she told the therapist that the Pastor, her father, had sexually abused her. She said that her mother held her down while her father raped her. The Pastor lost his job, his kids, and his dignity. The woman was asked to do an exam and she agreed. So they checked her out and she had no sign of being raped, or sexually active.. she was still a virgin. The case was dropped with no charges. I used that example to tell you that the memory can indeed make things up.

However, I don't think that your brain is making this up. Based on the intensity of fear that you feel. I think it is possible it could be real. I suggest you talk to someone you trust about this and make sure it gets settled. You need to talk about your feelings and make sure YOU are safe.

Feel free to PM me anytime you'd like to talk.

Stay strong.

-Brittany

[Agoraphobia♥]

It can be hard for others to accept something that you are just remembering after having blocked it out for so long. I was afraid of people thinking that way when I the memories flooded back of my friend's brother molesting me. I was scared that no one would be believe me because after it happened I blocked it out. I did the wrong thing and waited after remembering it to ask for help. But the point is, for it to come back as vivid as it did and the intensity of fear, it was probably real, and you know that it was. Just ignore the people who say it was imagination because they will not help you at all.