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MidnightMay Offline
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At therapy when.. - May 1st 2012, 09:30 PM

You know when you have one of those days where you don't feel like talking. I did that today at my session. It has been one of those days I just feel ready to give up. I dont know why but sometimes I just don't feel like opening up to her. She told me that it frustrates her when she can't help people and she feels they won't let her. Sometimes I make her feel that way. I just wanted to reply sometimes you frustrate me. I guess I feel like since I move soon and will be changing people whats the point.

I also want to add those who talk about notes. Today I didnt talk much and she seemed to have more to write than she did when I do talk.

Do you ever feel like you don't want to talk there?
I know it sounds weird but I do kinda like sittng in the silence there it still feels comforting.

Anything you wanna add about yours?
I am open to hearing about what other places are like.


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Re: At therapy when.. - May 1st 2012, 10:34 PM

Hey,

I often feel like I don't want to talk, so sometimes I write instead. Talking about completely irrelevant things might help to get you started. I usually end up discussing what's for dinner or something equally trivial with my counsellor before getting into any in depth conversations. Have you explained to them about you feeling comforted in the silence?

Right at the beginning I asked mine not to write notes about me while I'm there - it actually really helped me to open up because now I feel less judged. They look for your facial expressions and body language, so they're likely to be writing about that. If you don't feel comfortable, don't be afraid to ask them what they're writing and/or if they can stop. If it helps you that's the main thing.

I hope this helps a little. :]
   
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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 12:16 AM

We sat in silence for a good 10-15 minutes. I started with the statement last night at work and she had a little smirk on her face. I ended up stopping and saying dont smile just cause I got bored and broke the silence. Funny thing is she thought she was going to get to know what has been going on but it was just about a little boy.

I am kind of afraid to ask what she writes and say anything about it. It really doesnt bother me because it part of her job to write them. I just knew before several people asked just put it out there.


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Earth without ART is just EH...
   
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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 01:49 AM

There have definitely been times when I don't feel like talking. My therapist is really good about that. She'll just let me sit there until I decide I'm ready. Or she'll sit there and start making small talk with me to try and make me feel more comfortable. But, she's never really tried to force me to talk because she knows I'll just shut down more.

I've always been a bit afraid to ask her what she's writing on her notepad. She drew me a picture once to help me understand what she was trying to say. But, I've never been able to outright ask her what she's writing. I only know what it's about if she chooses to show me. I've definitely been curious. I'm just not always sure I want to see what's on the page.


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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 02:11 AM

My therapist has a more relaxed style. She doesn't take any notes while I'm in the room. If it is something you don't like then speak up but if you're afraid to say 'stop scribbling on that freaking clip board and look at me' then you could either write it down. It sounds to me like your therapist isn't a good match for you. I can't believe she tried to make the appointment about how SHE feels so sad when you aren't an open book. The appointment should be about your needs and your feelings. How soon do you move? If you don't really like your current therapist and you are moving really soon it might not be worth it to see her and instead you could put effort into finding a new therapist wherever you're moving to. And when you're looking for a new therapist in your new town you don't have to go with the first person you see. You aren't going to get much help if your therapist and you are a bad match. No matter what you do oil and water just don't mix. In addition to therapy you might want to considering going to group therapy in your new town. Having people around you that are close to your age talking about their issues in a more relaxed environment could help you open up. Group therapy doesn't seem as 'clinical' or stiff as one on one therapy can be sometimes. I hope you find what you're looking for. Take care<3

Lots of love<3 Mimi



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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 02:27 AM

Yes I have one time sat in therapy and tryed to sleep one time no joke yes I tried to sleep but I couldnt get that comfortable in the chair. So yeah we didnt do much talking at all. Also when I dont talk its kinda awkward having your therapist just sit and stare at you.
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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 02:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by soul View Post
My therapist has a more relaxed style. She doesn't take any notes while I'm in the room. If it is something you don't like then speak up but if you're afraid to say 'stop scribbling on that freaking clip board and look at me' then you could either write it down. It sounds to me like your therapist isn't a good match for you. I can't believe she tried to make the appointment about how SHE feels so sad when you aren't an open book. The appointment should be about your needs and your feelings. How soon do you move? If you don't really like your current therapist and you are moving really soon it might not be worth it to see her and instead you could put effort into finding a new therapist wherever you're moving to. And when you're looking for a new therapist in your new town you don't have to go with the first person you see. You aren't going to get much help if your therapist and you are a bad match. No matter what you do oil and water just don't mix. In addition to therapy you might want to considering going to group therapy in your new town. Having people around you that are close to your age talking about their issues in a more relaxed environment could help you open up. Group therapy doesn't seem as 'clinical' or stiff as one on one therapy can be sometimes. I hope you find what you're looking for. Take care<3

Lots of love<3 Mimi

I do like her and she does that knowing eventually I will talk. She has me figured out enough to know how to get me to tell her things. I wouldn't even make small talk which she usually thinks its not something good. I move in three weeks and the two of us are going to pick a person.


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Always keep a smile on your face and Lots of love in you heart! <3

Dont wear a mask and suffocate
take it off and breathe

Earth without ART is just EH...
   
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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 02:56 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Iris. ♥ View Post
There have definitely been times when I don't feel like talking. My therapist is really good about that. She'll just let me sit there until I decide I'm ready. Or she'll sit there and start making small talk with me to try and make me feel more comfortable. But, she's never really tried to force me to talk because she knows I'll just shut down more.

I've always been a bit afraid to ask her what she's writing on her notepad. She drew me a picture once to help me understand what she was trying to say. But, I've never been able to outright ask her what she's writing. I only know what it's about if she chooses to show me. I've definitely been curious. I'm just not always sure I want to see what's on the page.
Like I said she does know me well enough to know how to get me to talk and its either make me feel bad or challenge me. She does sit there for awhile.

I understand comepletely not sure if you really want to see but yet you feel you do. It doesnt really bother me that she writes in front of me and it makes me feel like she does actually listen.


feel free to PM me...

Always keep a smile on your face and Lots of love in you heart! <3

Dont wear a mask and suffocate
take it off and breathe

Earth without ART is just EH...
   
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Re: At therapy when.. - May 2nd 2012, 12:22 PM

It is not easy talking about the things that worry you, and less to a "stranger". It is normal that sometimes we don't feel like talking... The thing is that when this happens u feel like ur spoiling your appointment, but if u can't, u can't... Sometimes it's better to wait until ur next visit than force urself, right?
   
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