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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
anzu Offline
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May 8th 2017, 11:28 AM

hello i dont really know where to post this but im having a sort of breakdown of sorts and i

really dont know who i am. at all

i feel like i'm all fake and i feel like im faking everything on a subconscious level. ive been struggling for a while with alot of mood swings and anxiety about friends and family and paranoia and i just

i feel like im faking everything and i feel like im not me i feel like im just. pieces of other people put together and im so scared that im not real im fake.i dont know what to do im sorry

hello. i also need help with,, bipolar like symptoms

i have mood swings at the tiniest things. i'm so happy! i feel so great, im talking alot and being happy but then all of a sudden i cant do something i want to do and i drop super bad and then even five minutes after id be happy again

i have bad relationships with people and i. feel like people hate me if they dont laugh loud enough at a joke i tell. i have paranoia that everyone talks about me and how bad i am and that they're all lying. i have bad relationships were i usually obsess over a certain person, and i never really hang out with anyone else but them. if they dont comfort me, then they hate me. id hate them but then after the arguments over they're my favourite person in the world

im sorry if i sound incoherent im not great at the moment

my ex described me once as "being one way one moment then something else the next" or somethn and whenever i get really happy about stuff i like my brother tells me im being hyper n stuff and it usually brings my mood down because i dont want to be annoying,

anyway sorry. any advice would be helpful. i'm 15 and im diagnosed with depression & GAD. ive been trying to get a proper re-diagnosis because i havent been going to school because i just. feel like i cant have healthy relationships with anyone and its just scary.
i also posted this on another forum and didnt get a response so i started to feel like they were all ignoring me and they hated me and i,
yeah

thank you for any help you give me,

Last edited by Celyn; May 8th 2017 at 12:22 PM. Reason: Merging posts
   
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Celyn Offline
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Re: i dont know who i am - May 8th 2017, 05:55 PM

Hey there and welcome to TeenHelp!

I merged your two threads into one as I felt they both had similar things that you wanted help on. I hope this is okay

I'm wondering why you feel fake? I understand that having mood swings and difficult relationships with others may affect how you feel about yourself, but as long as you aren't changing yourself for anyone, then you aren't fake. Perhaps when you feel fake you can take a moment to list all the facts about you, what you like and dislike, hobbies and talents, personality etc. so that it gives you a better idea of who you are.

It must feel awful when you are having mood swings and being paranoid that others don't like you. I'm not too sure on how to handle mood swings, but perhaps you can try to recognise when you are having one and what might've caused it and try to plan what to do in case it happens again? As for feeling paranoid that others don't like you, remember that we are often our worst critics. The thoughts that you have are just thoughts and aren't necessarily true at all.

You aren't being incoherent at all. It must be difficult for you to maintain relationships with mood swings and then getting strongly attached to someone only to swing between loving and hating them. I want you to know that despite your mood swings and difficulties, that at the core, you are a good and worthy person, I'm sure.

We can't give a diagnosis on here since we aren't professionals, but definitely think it's worthwhile trying to get re-diagnosed if you feel that your current diagnosis don't match up with what you are experiencing. I understand that you have been avoiding school, but maybe you can go into school, even if it's just to try to talk to the school counsellor? If not, perhaps you can see your doctor instead?


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