Paranoia.

[Iris. ♥]

I'm not entirely sure if this is the right forum for this. So, mods, feel free to move it if you need to.

Anyways, I've been having this increasing sense of paranoia lately. I feel like my friends aren't really my friends. It's like the people that act like they enjoy being around me don't really like me at all. I'm really just waiting for the day that I find out that everything has just been a cruel joke to hurt me. Does that even make sense? Am I the only one that feels like this??

[Thirteen]

I feel like this [pretty much] all the time. Seriously.

Question, how do you feel in other social situations, with other people? (i.e. Malls, School, etc.)

[JellyBean4986]

I've felt like this before, and it really sucks. I think the best thing you can really do is to try to relax. Sometimes the best way to deal with stuff like this is to prove it wrong. Take one of your friends aside and talk to him/her and ask them why they're your friend and why they like hanging out with you. If you have a really close friend that you think you could even talk to about how you feel that would even be better. But know that if people are calling you to hang out or inviting you out, or your inviting them over, and they show up, then they like you, and want to be your friend.

If this doesn't help, or it seems to get worse then you should consider talking to a school counselor or an adult about it. Sometimes paranoia can come out when your really stressed and anxious. So working on the anxiety and things that are causeing you stress can help make the parinoia go away too.

If you ever need to talk pm me.

[Iris. ♥]

Thirteen: In other social situations where I don't necessarily know the people, I still feel small. I feel like people are talking about me, laughing at me, or judging me negatively. Is it the same way for you?

Jellybean4986: I might do that. But, part of me feels like it'll seem clingy if I ask a friend about it. It might seem like I'm fishing for compliments. I dunno. Would you think that way if a friend asked you why you're friends with them?

[Thirteen]

Originally Posted by LovesBrokenDream

Thirteen: In other social situations where I don't necessarily know the people, I still feel small. I feel like people are talking about me, laughing at me, or judging me negatively. Is it the same way for you?

Well, yes and no. It's a bit different than that for me, but I'm not going to get into detail.

I think your problem might be low self-confidence, causing a mild Anxiety. I wouldn't say it's actually clinical Anxiety (mind you, I don't know a whole lot still, seeing as I don't know you in person), but I would say that something has you feeling anxious and paranoid, and often, it ends up being a confidence thing.

Have you considered seeing a counselor, or a therapist? Having somebody to talk to about these things, who can give you constructive advice/ideas based on their professional experience, could prove beneficial.

[Iris. ♥]

I've thought about seeing a therapist a couple of times. Right now, I just have a church mentor. But, even she's suggested that I go to counseling because there are some things she can't help me with. Maybe it really is something for me to go for.

[Childish Giggle]

Its okay to feel like that once in a while, but when it gets too much, it can be dangerous.
Have you had any past experiences to make you feel that way? Has anyone around you given you any reason to feel this way?

[Gymnophoria]

I've felt this way before as well. I'm also totally convinced that everyone can hear what I'm thinking and that I'm being watched 24/7 to the extent that cracks in the wall have to be covered and I can't change in my room, I have to be under the duvet.
It's a good idea to speak to someone about it to see if there's a reason for it. Often thoughts like these are triggered by something. For example, I've always had these thoughts, but they got a lot worse after members of my family started watching me and "keeping an eye" on me so they could report back to someone and this made it a lot worse. Because I WAS being watched by them, I became convinced that they had found extreme ways to do that.

The doctor I saw about it told me that people often throw around the word "paranoid" just like when someone's feeling down, they're "depressed" so speaking to a doctor or professional is good because they can help you to understand exactly what is going on and how you can deal with it.

Think I went a bit off topic, but I hope I helped somewhat.

[Dr.Bobby]

FYI: Paranoia is an irrational, unreasonable fear, a sense of impending doom, harm, etc., all without any basis whatsoever in reality, there are no clear triggers for it. In short, it's based on stuff inside (the way you process information), rather than responses to actual events IRL. So, feeling a sense of loss or abandonment by someone who has told you off and walked away from you wouldn't qualify. Fearing space aliens swooping in and devouring you and therefore staying in the basement with aluminium foil wrapped on the windows would.

So, we cannot diagnose you with it or with something else, but you can see if that FYI fits.

Regardless of what you call this, though, it sounds unsettling. The first step would be to do a reality check, ask yourself what your friends are doing to make you feel a sense of abandonment, and see if that's the case, ask them. The feelings should go away when the underlying assumptions are checked for accuracy.

[Iris. ♥]

Pisces: I've definitely had some things happen in my past that have made me feel this way. I've had people do exactly what I fear before. I have a low self-esteem already and it kind of crushed me. I think that might be part of the reason that I'm convinced everyone around me is going to do the same thing.

Gymnophoria: I don't think you went too off-topic. I definitely understand what you're saying about feeling like people know what you're thinking. Have you ever had a really weird thought and then someone in the room laughs or gives you a look? It's creepy.

Dr. Bobby: If that's the definition of paranoia, then I don't think I necessarily have it about the situation that I posted about. Do you have any other words that might be more appropriate for describing it? Also, sometimes I feel like there's something in my room that's waiting to hurt me . . almost like a demon. It happens every couple of weeks for a few nights in a row. Is that a form of paranoia? Or is it just idiocy?

[Dr.Bobby]

Samantha, its definitely not 'idiocy'! I'm not sure what to call it, surely it's scary (not very clinical, I know). Do you know what's causing it? Has something happened to you that could account for the sense of vulnerability? Has there been a 'Demon' in your life who has threatened or actually harmed you? Paranoia is irrational, the fear is not related to anything in reality. So, the first step in determining what this is is to try to figure out what it means and where it comes from.

Your first situation sounds more like a heightened sensitivity to loss/abandonment. Again, try to think about why that might be an issue for you, and you have some answers about the origin of the feeling.

[Childish Giggle]

To me it sounds like past experiences are getting to you.