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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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Evanesco Offline
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Things aren't going well - July 15th 2015, 01:28 AM

Posting here for some support I guess. Things are going down hill with my eating disorder and I don't know how to fix it. I'm restricting again, every meal is a struggle and I'm skipping most of them. I have no idea how to get better, the only thing that's helped has been antidepressants, but idk if they count as helping because when I'm on them I just binge instead. I'm off them at the moment anyway because I ran out, there was a mess up at the doctors, and then I got too anxious to go back. I have no professional support. I wouldn't even know how to get any. I'm sick of this thing, I've had it too long, eight years is too long.


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Re: Things aren't going well - July 15th 2015, 02:31 AM

I hope you're okay. You are really so strong for having gone through eight whole years of it, really. Have you ever tried starting a food journal to keep track if you are getting enough nutrients in your body? Sometimes your body craves things it doesn't have, because it needs them. I know you're anxious about your doctor too, but that seems important right now and you know it is. Is there any way you could call sometime and make an appointment?


   
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Re: Things aren't going well - July 15th 2015, 02:18 PM

'Ello

Eight years is a long time (pardon me stating the obvious) to be suffering from something as invasive and threatening as an eating disorder. Over that time I'm guessing you've had good days and bad days, periods of recovery, periods of relapse, times when it's been particularly bad and good right? Well, this period is one of those. It's not the end of your story and that's something important to remember: time is going to pass, and it's up to you whether you look back on this time and say it was a particularly bad time, or a time when you decided to really make a change. Give yourself a time frame, say 2 months- where do you want to be then? The things you do now are going to decide whether that time is going to be a struggle or a struggle where you have the upper hand. I know it's not as easy as that- hell, it's like 2000x more difficult than it sounds, maybe more- but sometimes it helps me to look beyond my current situation and into the future. Where the actual things that are bothering me now probably aren't going to exist. It's like knowing it's, I dunno, like time for your favorite concert? And you get up and go early because you know the time is coming as opposed to just coasting along and reacting? I think what I'm trying to say is do things now that will benefit you in the future. That's probably the tl;dr here

Is there someone that can go to the doctors with you? Not to speak for you, just to distract you and make jokes in the waiting room. Anticipation anxiety is often worse than the anxiety you're going to feel actually in the situation. I'm yet to find a way to stop being anxious about future events, but distraction seems to work okay (I can't stress enough how individual distractions are...like only gaming works for me. Only one game too. League of Legends. It's online so I can't pause it to freak out, there's other people on my team who are relying on me and who I can talk to, and it keeps my attention and nervous energy on something else. Literally no other distraction works for me ). Also talking about loud to yourself in response to negative thoughts can be more effective than just answering back in your head. Just er, make sure you are actually alone

Antidepressants mess with your appetite, that's practically a given. You do need to look a bit further than that though. Are they making you more hungry? Eat Less hungry? Eat foods easy to stomach. Urge to binge: are you eating enough, or is this the result of you denying earlier hunger? If you binge, consider that you're binging because your body just really really needs some kind of substantial food. Don't be a dick to it and then punish it afterwards, it needed it Make sure you're getting enough food. Urge to restrict? Blog about that urge, shout about it, scream (if you know what I mean ) about it. Give into it? Hellll nooo

You sure as hell aren't in this alone. We're all right behind you, and we're here to talk to every single step of the way. I literally have a uni break for 2 more months. I'm going insane. Make as many posts as you want, I'll love you for it



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Re: Things aren't going well - July 18th 2015, 05:42 AM

You mentioned that you don't know how to get professional help but you've gotten it before via doctor because someone had to prescribe you the antidepressants. Not all antidepressants are the same so it may take some trial and error but I don't know your history. Did you only give one or two a try? Also, meds might not be the answer or at least not the only answer. Consider seeing a psychologist and talking through your some of your issues with them and if you can find a medication combination right for you, this along with talking to a professional regularly could make a big difference. You might also want to find an ED support group in your area so you could go to a meeting when you were having an especially hard time. I hope some of these suggestions help. Don't give up and fact that you're here asking for ways to find better ways to help yourself shows so much strength.

Lots of love,
Mimi



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Evanesco Offline
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Re: Things aren't going well - July 20th 2015, 07:37 PM

I've recieved professional help for depression, but I don't know how to for an eating disorder, because no one believes me (I'm not thin).

I'm scared. I could barely eat all week and now I'm binging and I'm right back in the cycle I was in when I was 16 and it's terrifying.


Join the Skeleton Clique on TH
Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do, then I should warn you - you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past. Aliens from the future. The day the Earth died in a ball of flame. It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: The trip of a lifetime!

Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless.
RIP Granddad Terry. I'll miss you.
   
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