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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
kelsey-marie Offline
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Exclamation I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 3rd 2009, 04:15 PM

My bestfriend moved to a new town only like 20 minutes away so I visit her a lot. But she lives in the bad part of the town and a lot of the kids she hangs out with do drugs and drink. She's always been a little more wild than me so she would try drugs. She told me that she had smoked weed before and gotten drunk. I asked her about it and she said she smoked weed about twice a month and got drunk a lot too. I really don't want her to ruin any chances of a good future with drigs and alchohol. Besides the kids down there could get her into even more trouble with other things and I'm worried. I've gone to adults but they do nothing and her mom does drugs too and lets my friend do whatever she wants. I don't want to stop hanging out with her but i don't want to be pulled into the whole situation. I've warned her to be careful but she never listens. Please help.
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 3rd 2009, 04:52 PM

If her mom is on drugs then this sounds like something for social services, or child protection. If her mom is also doing drugs, then that is dangerous to all the children in the house. Have you talked to your parents about contacting them yet?




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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 3rd 2009, 07:40 PM

Hey,

I would try talking to a responsible adult about what is going on with your friend. You have a right to be concerned especially if she is living almost completely unsupervised. Don't let this go on for much longer. Do something about it as soon as possible before things get worse. If you are to afraid to talk to your parents about it then I would consider talking to your school guidance counselor because they might have some ideas on how best to handle this situation. Taking action could very well be what saves your friend from a very bad fate. Drug abuse isn't something that should be taken lightly. I wish you the best of luck with everything. Take care and be strong.

Lots of love <3 Mimi



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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 3rd 2009, 10:40 PM

How old is she? If she's only dabbling in weed and alcohol every so often I don't see the problem here. Plenty of kids experiment with pot and alcohol and it doesn't harm them for the most part.
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 4th 2009, 05:57 AM

Experimentation in moderation is something everyone should strive for. When it becomes a problem is when you should be worried, and I think at that point you'll know very clearly that she needs help. Honestly, bring it up in a conversation some time, talk to her about it, and maybe work up the courage to give it ago yourself, if you feel comfortable. If not, no big deal.

Do you need to try these things? No, just like you don't need to try sky diving, or surfing, or skateboarding, or dancing at a club...

You know, everyone tells you life is "Short and Sweet"... But keep this in mind. Life is "short", regardless of what you do. The "sweet" part is in your hands.

EDIT: Let me try and put it in perspective, since I think it will help. The typical outlook on most drugs are, "Your friends do it, they try to convince you to do it, you start doing it, and your life is ruined one session at a time." I hate to say this, since I know some bible belt women on here will burn me at the stake for it... but here it goes. First off, most of it's true. You probably have friends that drink and do drugs. They'll probably try and convince you to try it out. You'll probably try it. It's just total bullshit when someone tells that trying either in a perfectly reasonable way begins a domino effect to ruin.

I agree the most casual of drinking and drug usage can lead to addictions and bigger problems, but that's not without a weak minded person.

You drive, right? Or at least you've ridden in a vehicle before. Look at it this way. When you're driving you're weighing the risks involved with that mode of transportation with the benefits it offers. (Enjoyment, speed, and efficiency... And yes, for those paying attention, I did just compare a car to a drug!)

In a nutshell, talk to your friend about it. Then, legitimately and honestly look into yourself for this next answer, because it is one you'll be giving the rest of your life. Life will always offer you risky endeavors. Some will involve little dangers, and others will threaten your life. It all comes down to whether you feel the risk is worth the enrichment of your life and the knowledge that follows. I answered this a long time ago, before drugs or alcohol were even available to me, and because of that I've decided to try them. I enjoy them on occasions with friends and family, but if I feel that they get in the way of my goals, I don't consider them for a second.

TL;DR - Drugs and alcohol are nothing special. Talk to your friend. Try them if you want. I like them, and they haven't fucked me up, and never will.

PS: Potheads are the happiest people I know, and if life isn't about being happy, what is it about?

Last edited by BardofSongs; May 4th 2009 at 06:11 AM.
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 4th 2009, 05:25 PM

I would talk to her about it, tell her why you are concerned, ect. with out being too judgmental or mean about it. Tell her that if she ever wants to talk, you're there to listen (if you are). And, just be careful that you dont get involved in it, and if you become involved you will need to distance the relationship.
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 4th 2009, 07:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by helpinginlove View Post
And, just be careful that you dont get involved in it, and if you become involved you will need to distance the relationship.
I understand our opinions on this matter differ, Helpinginlove, and I respect your point of view, but it's this kind of advice that I feel misleads people. If the friend's habits become a problem and too much of a temptation, then YES. You should distance the relationship if it comes to that...

But at the same time, friends are a great windows to new experiences. They know you, they know what you like, they know what you hate, and most importantly, they know what you're comfortable with.

If this is just some casual drug experimenting or tamed drinking, then there is no reason to leave a friend, even if you don't agree with what they are doing. It's a horrible idea to end a friendship simply because you both don't see the same way on a single topic.
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 5th 2009, 12:27 AM

Ok heres why I'm the most worried. we're not 16 we're both 13 so in my opinion too young to be into that stuff. I'm not trying to say everyone who does it is a bad person but It's not something for me. I'm sure eventually I'll probably try one or the other but not when I'm 13. I've gone to the most tusted adults I can think of even a D.A.R.E officer but nothing happens. Honestly I'm afraid to tell my parents but i don't want my fears to hurt my friend. Thanks for your opinions and more advice would be helpful!
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 5th 2009, 02:26 PM

It's sickening to hear how much younger these kids dabbling in drugs gets each year. If she's only 13, then yeah i'd definitely tell an adult. That's a little ridiculous. Normally i'd disagree with this advice, but if she falls into the wrong crowd one night or a party with much older people especially guys and she's under the influence, she could end up sexually assaulted or ruining her body and potentially life. Don't be afraid to tell someone about this.
   
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Re: I'm afraid my best friend is on drugs. - May 6th 2009, 10:29 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by kelsey-marie View Post
we're not 16 we're both 13 so in my opinion too young to be into that stuff.

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Yes, that's a bit too young to be trying these kinda things. As far as talking to adults/officers... I don't think you should resort to that just yet, unless you feel it's gone down hill really quick. Your best bet is to just confront her about it, and make sure she's keeping it reasonable or even possibly putting it off for awhile.

I'm not an expert on anatomy, but I know without a doubt the human body can only process so much alcohol at a time, and I don't imagine a 13 year old can take much. In the case she gets alcohol poisoning, she better have some good friends ready to take action. (And it DOES happen.)

Anyway, best of luck.
   
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