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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Unhappy Being a younger twin sucks. What to do? - August 12th 2013, 12:54 PM

There are bad things about being a twin. But something worse than that is being the YOUNGER twin, and also being the smaller twin. I can't count the times I've been sized up by friends and relatives about having to 'catch up' to my brother. And not being referred to by my name as well sucks. Instead of my name, I'm Alex's little brother. Not George. Alex's LITTLE brother. Looking younger than him, many people often write me off as the irritating little brother. Someone to be pushed aside. Oh don't worry about HIM. He's just the immature younger one. Dude come on. I'm 2 MINUTES younger. Getting passed over by girls sucks. When faces with a choice, many girls have chosen him over me. I can remember three girls who I was looking to date (at different times). Everything goes swimmingly until they met my brother. He can do everything I can, but Better! He's bigger and stronger and looks older! He dated all of them then dumped them. But when I try to pick up the pieces and try again, I look too similar to him to seriously date which essentially kills my chances. Nobody settles for less when they had a taste of something more. I got a birthday present that was addressed to both of us ( a weight set and rowing machine) but was told to let my brother use it as he is bigger so he should be the sportier one. How do I deal with these things when we often have to share?
   
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Re: Being a younger twin sucks. What to do? - August 12th 2013, 09:31 PM

Hey there!

I'm the older twin; older by six minutes. But my brother is several inches taller than me and weighs a lot more than I do. Therefore, he can beat me up easily. We were at the doctor's and the woman goes, "That's your twin?" And I'm thinking, "Gee, thanks."

My situation is a little different than yours though, my brother is special needs. Don't be afraid to tell people that you don't like being referred to as the little or immature one. Trust me, two minutes doesn't make a difference, I promise. Those people are the immature ones, not you. If those girls passed you by, then they're missing a nice guy. You will find someone out there eventually. The sports machine sounds pretty frustrating. Could you ask your parents about maybe getting the chance to use it?

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Re: Being a younger twin sucks. What to do? - August 12th 2013, 10:37 PM

I have a 2 years younger brother. Sometimes, he's an absolute dick to me and sometimes we are the best of friends. A strong sibling rivalry, especially among twins of the same gender born 2 minutes apart, is to be expected. Anyways, here's my two cents on what I would do in your shoes: try to prove to relatives that just because you were born 2 MINUTES after him doesn't mean you are lesser and more immature then him. Try to demonstrate something that makes you look talent or unique with your relatives watching. I'm sure that will direct their attention away from him. As for the girls, I would try to lay low for a while and if you do end up dating someone, try to keep their attention focused on you and not him (I've never been much of a ladies man, so don't treat this advice as something from an expert). If someone compares you two and calls you immature, I would pass them off as being immature and closed minded.




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Re: Being a younger twin sucks. What to do? - August 14th 2013, 09:11 PM

hi,
i'm an older twin, but i do sort of understand you problem, you see, ever since my brother grew (he is now about a foot taller) everyone thinks i'm the younger sister. i think if you are a twin, someone is going to be the smaller twin or the one who isn't as good at sports. its just the problem with being a twin, unfortunately. i agree with cassie. just tell people that you don't like being called "the little brother".

as far as dating, i would wait until a girl notices you for you and not "the little brother". as lame as it sounds, there is a girl out there who will like you for you.

about the birthday present: try talking to your parents. i know that is a hard thing to do (my parents never want to listen) but its worth a shot. try writing a letter. that has worked for me in the past. best of luck!
   
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Re: Being a younger twin sucks. What to do? - August 14th 2013, 09:43 PM

Hey there! I have an older twin (he's 4 minutes older), and I share with you the frustration of being a twin. First of all, we look and act, nothing a like. Before he grew over six feet, people thought i was his older sibling. Not anymore :/ . People also have told me hat he's kind of a jerk, and I can totally agree. Two months ago, he got a girlfriend, who's really pretty. And he won't quit talking about her. And my family and classmates won't stop going on and on about me, who tends to have the...sad relationships. So when people say things you don't like, like calling you his little brother, tell them that you don't like that. Because people who don't have a twin, don't really understand how annoying it is to have one and to be constantly compared to one another. I hate being a twin. But what's helped me along is to find things that I'm good at, and to only focus on me, instead of with what he's good at. Do something new that he hasn't done. For example, I do wrestling. He does robotics. You don't have to share everything and do everything together. Also, express how you feel towards your parents. They need to know how this is all making you feel. Ughh, even the worst part about being a twin: sharing a birthday
As I stated before: find something that you can do, that your brother doesn't. And believe me, there will be plenty of girls out there who like you for you. Don't sell yourself short
Good luck, and I hope everything works out!


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